The Cat Lady Chronicles

Chemo: Cycle 4... or 2-2?

2012-02-12T19:57:00.000-05:00

I was having a severe pain in my left uterine area around January 19th/20th, it was only when I needed to urinate, but no pain during urination or anything, and after I urinated it was gone. It felt like my uterus was being pulled out or falling out or something. It was so severe I could barely walk. It lasted about 2 days or so. Just plain weird!

On the day of my chemo, Jan. 24th, I was having pain behind my left ear, the left side of my head, and little in my left shoulder… I was afraid I may have a blood clot. The P.A. and I decided to just wait and watch since none of it made any real sense. It wasn’t like I had a cold or sinus infection, just another weird situation. The pain moved to the right side a few days later and then disappeared.

Chemo went well… no incident.

Friday, Jan. 27th, I woke up that afternoon coughing and pain in my right lung area. By evening I was running a temperature. At 8:45 pm my temp was 101.1°, I called the on-call doctor. She put me on antibiotics, said it might be pneumonia. I didn’t think it was because the cough was not a cold kind of cough and I hadn’t been sick. You don’t wake up with pneumonia, you build up to it. But this diagnosis was with limited info and over the phone. Anyways… by 11:30 pm my temp was 101.5°… at 1:00 am it was 101.6°.

Saturday I started taking Percocet w/Acetaminophen for the pain and trying to get temp down. I was also packing my head in ice. The pain was in my right lung/chest area and extending up to my shoulder and neck area. I was in so much pain I couldn’t sleep.

By the weekend of Feb. 4th, the pain wasn’t as bad and I had this poking feeling in my throat/esophagus area and a coarseness that was causing the cough. It took me awhile but finally realized it was a yeast infection in my throat… also developed a vaginal yeast infection… all from the horrible antibiotics. So I started taking the Fluconazole (Diflucan) I had left over from December antibiotic yeast outbreak and Monistat 3 (went thru 2 boxes of it). Still couldn’t rid my body of all the yeast. On Friday, Feb. 10th, I called my doctor and got another prescription of Fluconazole, this one was 150 mg tablets instead of the 100 mg. I took one Friday night and meant to take another one on Saturday, but forgot to… regardless, the one was enough to finish eliminating the yeast. THANK GOD!!!!

So now I’m yeast free, cough free, and pain free… except for the uterine pain I’m having again when I have to urinate. What the hell!??? I can't get a break!

My Oncologist, Dr. Lola Olajide: Rex on Call - Breast Cancer

2012-02-12T16:07:00.002-05:00

Here is my oncologist... Dr. Lola Olajide, Rex Hematology Oncology Associates (Rex Cancer Center).

Apple's Shame

2012-02-11T23:21:00.001-05:00

I don't buy into Apple... I don't do iPods, iPhones, iPads, Mac, or iTunes. I don't use them, I don't buy them, never cared to have them. There has always been something about Apple's stuff that I just didn't like. The same feeling I had about AOL. Just this gut feeling about how they do business.

If this kind of stuff bothers you, then quit supporting it... QUIT buying the products! Apple is going to deny knowing anything about it, but you should know who you are doing business with... ignorance is no excuse. Besides... everybody knows that businesses take their business overseas because it's cheaper... and we ALL know why it's cheaper... it's because the workers are being abused and taken advantage of.

Investigations Reveal Long Trail of Abuses at Apple Suppliers
Jan 27, 2012 4:45 AM EST

Recent reports, including The New York Times’ gripping series, shed new light on the abusive treatment of workers at the tech giant’s Chinese suppliers.

Millions of people who have never been to China carry a piece of Longhua in their pocket. The city in the southern province of Hainan is home to one of several plants run by Foxconn Technology Group, a company that has gotten attention as the manufacturer in whose facilities poorly paid Chinese workers make iPhones and Dell computers, among other hot tech items.

This is hardly the first time reports of abuse have emerged from the closely guarded secret of Apple’s supply line. But in recent weeks, investigations, including a shocking series from The New York Times, have brought the slow-simmering waters of public opinion to a boil as they reveal the lives of the Chinese workers who labor at low cost and high risk to produce the ever-sleeker, ever-slimmer devices for which the world clamors.

1. Long Hours, Low Pay

A year before the debut of the iPhone, a British newspaper drew attention to allegations of abuse of workers at the Foxconn plant, reporting that 200,000 of the manufacturer’s workers clocked 15-hour days and were paid $50 a month to make iPods. The news grabbed attention on Mac blogs, causing the company to say that it would investigate the alleged abuses. “Apple is committed to ensuring that working conditions in our supply chain are safe, workers are treated with respect and dignity, and manufacturing processes are environmentally responsible,” Apple said in a statement at the time.

2. A Raid, A Suicide

It was a nightmare come true for Sun Danyong, a product manager in one of Foxconn’s Apple units. A prototype in his care, one of 18 beta N90 iPhones, was missing. As the Nanfang Daily reported, Sun grew increasingly upset, texting his girlfriend and another friend as he tried to find the device. The 25-year-old ran out of time and luck when Foxconn security came knocking at his door, looking for the missing iPhone. The next day, Sun killed himself by jumping out the window of his 12th-floor apartment.

3. Password Protected

An expansive industrial city, complete with sleeping quarters, cafeterias, and even banks and a post office, all locked up behind a security edifice that included metal detectors and fingerprint recognition. That’s what reporters found when they visited the Foxconn plant in Longhua in 2010. Trucks came and went, dumping raw materials and lumbering out laden with haute technology. While working on the article, a Reuters reporter found out firsthand what happens when one draws the unwanted attention of Foxconn security. While taking pictures outside a plant in the nearby city of Guanlan, the reporter was grabbed, kicked, and threatened by guards.

4. In Response to Suicides, Nets and a Pledge

A spate of nine worker suicides in three months, including that of a 19-year-old worker, at the Shenzhen Foxconn plant led to an incredible reaction among management at the manufacturer in May 2010. According to the Sydney Morning Herald, higher-ups asked workers to sign a suicide pledge, a promise not to kill themselves. As if heights were the only means available to workers ready to end their lives to escape the grueling hours and claustrophobic conditions that employees described to reporters, the company organized “roof patrols,” and hung nets from the sides of the building.

5. Apple Responds to Suicides

After the 10th employee plunged to his death, the Foxconn suicides made headlines in May 2010. Apple and other Foxconn customers issued statements, and said they would conduct their own investigations into the incidents. “We are saddened and upset by the recent suicides at Foxconn,” Apple said, saying it was in touch with Foxconn management and “we believe that they are taking this matter very seriously.” In a somewhat bizarre bid to show that they had matters in hand, Foxconn management led reporters on a tour of its Longhua location, pointing out that it would drape more nets from the dormitories where it billets its workers.

6. Techies Take Issue

The Foxconn controversy lurched into the collective consciousness of Apple’s iFanatics when a Gizmodo editor took to the pages of Wired early last year to describe what he found on a tour of the Shenzhen plant. “It’s hard not to look at the nets,” he wrote, describing the still-hanging suicide precautions that flapped morbidly around the campus. “They drape every precipice, steel poles jutting out 20 feet above the sidewalk, loosely tangled like volleyball nets in winter.” He was struck most by the sheer size of the Foxconn facility, which he wrote his guides were quick to compare to a “college campus.” Their assurances did little to assuage Joel Johnson’s guilt. After he left, the technophile found himself still asking, “When 17 people take their lives, I ask myself, did I in my desire hurt them? Even just a little?”

7. Apple Finds Children and Chemicals

Apple revealed in a report released last year that it had found 91 children working at various points along its supply line in 2010, nine times more than it found in a similar self-study a year earlier. There were reportedly underage youth working at 10 facilities that manufactured Apple products. The company’s report also acknowledged that 137 workers at an Apple supplier had been poisoned by n-hexane, a chemical that can cause extreme nervous-system damage after overexposure. N-hexane was reportedly used to clean iPhone screens.

Jobs’s conversation killer of a response? “Those jobs aren’t coming back.”

8. Four Dead in Explosion

Foxconn’s Chengdu location, said by experts to be one of the sites where iPads are produced, was wracked by an explosion in May of last year, killing four workers and injuring 18. Chengdu city officials were first to comment on the incident, and said that the blast originated with “combustible dust” in a polishing shop. The explosion led to a partial shutdown of the plant, as experts estimated the delay could cut production of iPad2s by 500,000 units in the second quarter.

9. A Real Jobs Zinger

Out-of-work Americans received some startling news via their New York Times iPhone app last Sunday. Played large and loud in front-page pixels was an account of how President Barack Obama had asked the late Steve Jobs what it would take to bring Apple’s manufacturing arms back to the United States. Jobs’s conversation killer of a response? “Those jobs aren’t coming back.” As the Times detailed, Apple has 20,000 workers abroad and 43,000 on American shores—but an additional 700,000 foreign workers are hired by Apple contractors to actually make the company’s blockbuster products.

10. The iPrice Tag

Drawing on years of reports, incidents, and material, The New York Times conducted an investigation published Thursday that pulled back the shroud of secrecy beneath which Apple’s suppliers had long operated. Former Apple executives told reporters that there’s little incentive for the company to endure the time and cost of finding alternate suppliers—and even if they went looking, there aren’t many that could handle orders of the scale Apple demands. “We’re trying really hard to make things better,” a former executive told the Times. “But most people would still be really disturbed if they saw where their iPhone comes from.”

Like The Daily Beast on Facebook and follow us on Twitter for updates all day long.

Matthew DeLuca is a reporter and researcher for Newsweek/The Daily Beast. He has written for New York’s Daily News and The Boston Globe, among other publications. He was the editor of Boston College's independent student newspaper, The Heights.

For inquiries, please contact The Daily Beast at editorial@thedailybeast.com.

http://www.thedailybeast.com/articles/2012/01/27/investigations-reveal-long-trail-of-abuses-at-apple-suppliers.html

Arnold & Stallone... funny bumping into you here!

2012-02-11T22:24:00.002-05:00

This cracked me up... also made me feel old.

Click on photo to enlarge.

Chemo: Cycle 3... or 1-2?

2012-02-10T02:27:00.000-05:00

I started that new chemo again --- the one geared towards my type of Lymphoma --- on Jan. 3rd, my birthday. It went okay; mom couldn’t go in with me, it’s that time of year when colds and flu are abound so no friends or family are allowed in the chemo rooms. She won’t be able to go in until April… so I get kind of bored sitting in there by myself.

I'm not sure if this counts as Chemo Cycle 3 or Cycle 1-2.

On the way home from chemo mom’s truck broke down. The radiator blew. It was about 35° out and I didn’t have a coat. We had to sit and wait for AAA to show up and for my sister to come pick us up. I was supposed to be having a special birthday dinner and the family was coming, but since the chemo took longer than expected and then the break-down, we wouldn’t have enough time to make the dinner without it running really late. So we opted to stop for Chinese take-out instead.

Cancer Post: Thanksgiving - Hospital Update

2012-01-31T23:59:00.001-05:00

Some of you already know that last Thanksgiving I was in the hospital again. I was one week away from my third treatment of this new chemo. The masses under my armpit blew up real big, plus I had inflammation and swelling of my breast. I couldn’t even put my arm down; it was sticking out from my body in a weird position because of all the swelling. The nerves in my arm became impinged and the back of my arm is still numb, possibly permanently. My right breast was almost three times its normal size, burning hot and red as can be. I had to pack down in ice for days.

I was doing laundry on Monday afternoon, Nov. 21st, and I was trying to open the bleach bottle, but the bottle slipped across the dryer away from me and my arm jerked trying to stop it. It hurt really bad… so much I was swearing. I put some ice on it in case I pulled something and within 2 hours it had swelled quite a bit. I kept ice on it while I slept that night, but when I woke up I couldn’t feel the back of my arm and the swelling was much worse. I called the Cancer Center and went down for them to check me out. I was admitted on Tuesday, November 22nd, but the breast swelling didn’t happen until Thanksgiving morning. They decided it was too dangerous to do surgery because of the blood vessels and nerves involved, so Wednesday they gave me radiation to the area.

Thanksgiving morning the on-call doctor woke me up and quickly ran through my case, I asked him for a hydrochlorothiazide and a furosemide pill (Water pill/Lasik) since I had some swelling and they had me on a sodium drip (to which I am sensitive to and causes me to swell), he denied me one of my Lasik’s. I explained I had to take them together because just one or the other didn’t have an effect on me, that’s why I was prescribed both of them… and I only take them as needed. He refused stating he thought it was causing my elevated sugar level… “Funny, I haven’t had any for several weeks, guess THAT can’t be the cause.” But of course, he’s the doctor… that went to school… he couldn’t be wrong… and of course would never admit to being wrong. Yes, he was one of THOSE doctors!

Around 10:30 am I was eating my breakfast when I leaned forward and my breast pressed against my leg, it was very painful. I looked down my gown, saw how big it was, how red it was, felt how hot it was, and the area around the nipple was rock hard. It scared the hell out of me and I started to cry… I thought for sure the cancer had moved into my breast. I called my nurse because I didn’t know what else to do… asked him to please come as soon as possible. After I explained and showed him, he put in a call for the on-call doctor to stop in. I waited for a little while and when he did show up… he didn’t come past the entryway, asked me what the problem seemed to be, I was a little taken aback because he didn’t come in or over to me and the way he questioned me… so I stood up and raised my gown. He said that’s probably just “something-something-or-other” and left. I was in such shock I don’t remember what he said… he never came in, never examined the breast, and didn’t even bother to explain the “something-something-or-other”. I was so upset and couldn’t stop crying.

The nurse that came in later that evening took care of it like the doctor should have… she examined the breast, marked the redness pattern with a marker so we could gauge if it was expanding or going away, then started packing me in ice. The next day the doctor came in, with a nurse for his protection; evidently word got out about what happened and that a friend of mine had called the hospital until she got hold of someone in charge who then came to see me about the situation. He lied outright about the situation, denying everything. I started to get upset because he was so lying and when I started to cry I decided that’s enough. I told him I wasn’t going to let him upset me again and I wanted him to leave my room immediately. I told him I wanted to be discharged after my radiation because I felt I was not getting the care I needed and I would rather go home and take care of myself. So I basically kicked him out of my room.

I had my radiation, was preparing to leave when my nurse came in with a prescription for antibiotics and pain killers. I thought, these are the antibiotics I was on when my breast swelled up and became inflamed… obviously they weren’t doing the job. So I had my nurse call the doctor and inquire about a different antibiotic… he denied my request. Oh, big surprise. **When I saw someone on Monday at the Cancer Center, one of the first questions I was asked was who and why had I been sent home with those antibiotics… then I was told to quit taking them and was prescribed something else… THANK YOU! Looks like I’m not so dumb am I!**

I went home, kept myself packed in ice, took my meds, took my lasiks which got rid of A LOT of fluids built up in my system, and the following Monday, Nov. 28th – Dec. 13th did daily radiation treatments, except on weekends.

Pic by Caressa...

2011-12-22T18:55:00.003-05:00

I am planning to do an update blog entry as soon as I get a chance. Got lots to update about the cancer stuff. Until then here's a picture my niece Caressa colored for me...

Chemo: Cycle 2

2011-11-12T15:52:00.001-05:00

Had my second round of chemo last Monday. Took longer than expected again... was there until 3 pm. Figure it's going to be that way always.

Was up most of Monday night because of the cramping. Better on Tuesday, Wednesday, and Thursday but had bad cramping again on Friday. I didn't take the Miralax on Thursday because I needed to go to Sam's Club. So I guess that proves that the Miralax is helping. Still tired.

Labs showed my INR dropped again... so now I'm taking 7.5 mg of Coumadin 4 days a week, and 5 mg for 3 days a week.

Talked with the doctor about the bone marrow transplant. We are going to finish this regimen of chemo to see if it works, if doesn't, then we'll go ahead with the bone marrow transplant. She just wants me to keep going on the financial end so if and when it's time, we're prepared. Even if this chemo puts me into remission for a while, with this type of cancer, eventually I will need the bone marrow transplant. I opened a separate checking account to deposit the funds into, I've got the PayPal account set up to receive money, and you don't have to have a PayPal account to donate. Now working on setting up the button and link.

Happy Birthday Marine Corps!

2011-11-10T02:38:00.000-05:00

November 10th is a big day for Marines. It's the 236th birthday of the United States Marine Corps. My dad was a Marine in Vietnam. I believe this day is more important to him than his own birthday.

This is my dad.

Dad when he was in the Marines.

(he's the dark one in the cap, American Indian ancestry on his father's side, he gets so dark when exposed to the sun; I got more of my mother's fair complexion)

Another Medication Change

2011-11-05T18:42:00.001-04:00

Last Monday I quit taking that Bentyl (Dicyclomine) for the cramping. It was causing a severe lack of concentration and I just could not focus at all, I was having a difficult time even thinking straight. I spent most of my time laying in bed sleeping or staring at the tv or out the window... sometimes at my computer screen watching my bubbles screensaver. I just wasn't accomplishing anything. It also caused me to have real blurry and fuzzy vision, so much so I couldn't drive. And weirdly enough, I started breaking out, which, in addition to all my other side effects, also cleared up a few days after stopping the medication.

I'm trying something a little different... I'm taking half a Miralax everyday to see if that will help. So far I'm just having minor cramping. Not sure if it's the Miralax regimen or just that it's been a couple of weeks since my chemo and maybe the medication has gone out of my system thus causing the cramping to diminish. My next chemo is Monday so I guess we'll be finding out. I'm going to talk to the doctor to see if there is some other medication I can try... not sure if taking Miralax everday is healthy.

On Abortion Clinics, Pro-Lifers Are 'Close'-Minded

2011-10-27T15:54:00.000-04:00

Family Research Council: Washington Update

Americans need to understand that when organizations like Planned Parenthood insist that women have a "right" to abortion, they don't mean a safe one. In clinics across the country, vulnerable women are shuttled in and out of clinics that look more like combat zones than surgical centers. Kermit Gosnell, who is on trial for 261 pages of abortion horrors at his Philadelphia clinic, put a real face on the "choice" movement. For his patients--and so many others--"choice" means being subjected to rusty equipment, bloodstained blankets, and untrained staff. And unfortunately, Gosnell is just one example of a nationwide nightmare. Like other clinic operators, the millionaire doctor shirked on safety to grow his profit margins. And thanks to a shift in pro-life strategy, that's all starting to change. In states across the country, America is getting serious about protecting women with airtight regulations for abortion clinics. In fact, when I was in the Louisiana legislature, I authored a bill to do exactly that. While conservatives are still trying to change people's minds about abortion, they're putting more emphasis on protecting the mothers that seek it. To do that, pro-lifers are cracking down on abortion at the source. It's what Dr. Theodore Joyce calls "The Supply-Side Economics of Abortion."

Yesterday, he expanded on this phenomenon in an article published by the New England Journal of Medicine. "Early approaches to restricting abortion access were directed largely at [women]--the demand side of the market and perhaps frustrated by many women's determination to overcome demand-side hurdles, abortion opponents have turned to supply-side restrictions, focusing on providers of abortion services. This strategy is likely to be more effective." Believe it or not, abortion is one of the least regulated surgeries in the United States. In Pennsylvania, for instance, one district attorney said the state's clinics have fewer regulations than beauty salons or public schools. So one approach pro-lifers have taken, most recently in Virginia and Kansas, is passing laws that force abortion clinics to meet the same standards as ambulatory hospitals. That means more licensed staff, better sanitation, bigger rooms, and cutting-edge equipment. To most of us, that only sounds logical. But to abortion clinics, the bulk of which cut corners to make a profit, it represents a huge hurdle in doing business. For them, the emphasis has always been on revenue, not patient safety. When they're asked to comply with strict new health standards, most would rather shut down than protect women.

Take the state of Texas, for instance. Seven years ago, legislators passed a law that required all abortions at or after 16 weeks be performed in a hospital or ambulatory surgical center. Dr. Joyce points out that the policy had a shocking effect on the abortion rate. In one year, "the number of abortions performed in Texas at or after 16 weeks of gestation dropped by 88%, from 3,642 in 2003 to 446 in 2004." In Arizona, he explains, bearing down on the clinics had a similar effect. Leaders there passed a rule that only doctors could perform abortions. "As a result," Dr. Joyce writes, "Planned Parenthood of Arizona stopped performing abortion services in three clinics, since only nurse practitioners had been available&" Ironically, the same groups spending millions of dollars to protect abortion are the ones fighting these laws. That, more than anything, should expose the pro-abortion movement for what it is: cold, calculating opportunists who see women as profit, not patients.

http://www.frc.org/washingtonupdate/on-abortion-clinics-pro-lifers-are-close-minded

New Medication Added

2011-10-26T17:24:00.001-04:00

I stopped taking the Allopurinol last Friday and the cramping has just gotten worse and worse since I stopped. I'm having severe cramping now. Extremely tired... like I just can't go on. Spending most my time in bed sleeping. Still having a problem with the lack of concentration.

I called the doctor today and she prescribed a new med, Bentyl (Dicyclomine), which is like Tylenol for your colon. It helps to reduce stomach and intestinal cramping, it slows the natural movements of the gut and relaxing the muscles in the stomach and intestines.

This medication can cause dizziness, drowsiness, lightheadedness, weakness, and blurred vision. Also can cause dry eyes, dry mouth, nausea, constipation and abdominal bloating. Oh how fun!! We'll see how it goes.

Hawk Found With Nail In Head In Calif.

2011-10-23T20:13:00.001-04:00

SAN FRANCISCO (AP) — A red-tailed hawk that rescuers said was shot in the head with a nail gun was recovering Sunday at a Northern California wildlife center.

The hawk, captured in a San Francisco park by rescuers Saturday, was doing "very well" while being cared for at the Wildlife Center of Silicon Valley in San Jose, said Rebecca Dmytryk, executive director of the Monterey-based group WildRescue.

"The nail dislodged and dropped out during transport with no sign of additional trauma and no bleeding," Dmytryk said.

The juvenile bird was trapped Saturday evening at the San Francisco Botanical Gardens. It was immediately transported to the wildlife center where specialists stayed late to receive it, Dmytryk said.

WildRescue had been notified of the injured bird nearly a week ago and had tried to trap it several times last week without success.

But observers got close enough to the bird to see the nail extending from its cheek through the front of its head. They said the hawk appeared to be in pain.

Dmytryk's group had been using a trap called a bal-chatri, a trap made of wire mesh, to try to catch the injured hawk.

Rescuers believe someone intentionally hurt the hawk earlier this month. A reward of $10,000 has been offered for information leading to the arrest and conviction of whomever harmed the bird.

She has said that wild birds like hawks are protected, and that it's a felony to try to capture the birds without a license.

http://news.yahoo.com/hawk-found-nail-head-recovering-calif-224556224.html

===========================

Seriously... what the hell is wrong with people??

Football: Wake Forest-Rolesville Hammers Millbrook

2011-10-22T19:56:00.001-04:00

CJ Shaw is my nephew, he played a great game last night and was interviewed after the game.

BY NATE TAYLOR - ntaylor@newsobserver.com

WAKE FOREST -- One by one, Wake Forest-Rolesville players praised C.J. Shaw before celebrating their 55-23 victory over Millbrook.

Though many players performed well Friday night, the fourth-ranked Cougars (9-1, 6-0 Cap Eight 4-A) knew this game belonged to Shaw.

He played a central role in keeping WF-R's chances of winning a conference title alive. Shaw, a backup defensive lineman who had never played a snap on offense, was forced to start at center with Jacob Baucom sidelined by illness.

"I knew I had to push hard," said Shaw, who learned WF-R's Wing-T offense this week. "I was trying to get everything done right."

The snap-exchange from Shaw to quarterback Cameron Fray never produced a fumble. And once Shaw started to get comfortable, WF-R's offense started gaining yards by chunks.

In the second quarter, the Cougars increased their lead on Millbrook (5-5, 2-4) with runs to the outside. On consecutive drives, running backs Petey Williams and Casty St. Louis each broke through Millbrook's defensive line for long runs. Williams ran for a 52-yard touchdown and St. Louis raced for a 67-yard score.

"Surprisingly, I enjoyed it," Shaw said. "If we open up a hole up, (Williams and St. Louis) are gone. It's awesome when you look up and they're 20 yards down the field."

Williams was impressed with Shaw's ability.

"To me he looked like a natural at it," he said.

Coach Reggie Lucas knows the offensive line is the most important aspect to the Cougars' success on offense. Though WF-R entered Friday's game averaging 35 points, the Cougars haven't thrown the ball more than 10 times in any single game. Lucas relies on this lineman to move defenders out of the way to create paths for the running backs.

Lucas said that's why Shaw was so vital to the Cougars game plan.

"He stepped in, and I thought he did a phenomenal job," Lucas said. "For the coaching staff to make that adjustment was key for us."

When Shaw found out Monday that he was going to have to learn a new position, he sought guidance from many of the same teammates who were proud of him after the game. After all, Shaw helped the Cougars score seven rushing touchdowns.

"At first, I didn't want to go to offense, but this is really fun," Shaw said. "I loved it."

Now, the Cougars will get their chance to win their sixth consecutive conference title when they play Leesville Road (9-0, 6-0) on the road next week.

Even if Shaw, a junior, doesn't play at center against Leesville Road, this is still his first season playing for the Cougars. So, how would it feel to know he helped the Cougars win it?

"It would be like ... the most awesome thing," Shaw said.

Taylor: 919-829-4538

http://www.newsobserver.com/2011/10/22/1585980/wake-forest-rolesville-hammers.html

Labs Today

2011-10-21T16:27:00.000-04:00

I had to go and do labs... 45 minute drive to take some blood and check my INR level. That's to make sure my blood is thin enough, I guess. Don't want to clot.

My level was low... can't remember the exact number, but was below a 2. They want it around 2.5. So they upped my Coumadin dosage a little bit, but only for two days a week. So now it's 5 mg per day, except two days a week I have to take 7.5 mg. They also want me to come back for labs in 10-14 days.

14 days would be the Friday before my next chemo, so I hoped we could just wait the 2 extra days and do it on that Monday. Nooooo, I have to make an extra trip. So my appointment is Wednesday, Nov. 2nd at 10:00 am. :(

So far this week I've only noticed a few minor reactions... not sure what is the chemo and what may be the Allopurinol. Or maybe it was just the mass death of cancer cells. Anyways, tonight is my last day for taking the Allopurinol... so that will hopefully shed some light in the next few days.

I have had some cramping, very tired (no energy what-so-ever), some dizziness, awful lack of concentration. Have slept a great deal. No nausea, but a decrease in appetite.

We'll see how it goes next week.

Chemo: Cycle 1

2011-10-17T23:58:00.001-04:00

Had my first round (or cycle, as they refer to it) of the new chemotherapy today. Had a bit of trouble accessing the port when we first got started. They couldn't find the place the needle had to go in. Freaked the nurse out, she seemed traumatized over it. My arm was still a little sore and at one point I DID feel the needle going in my arm... which caused me to flinch. But they soon figured it out and I'm usually a pretty good sport about this kind of stuff. Sometimes things like this happen. Now they know what they're looking for.

So far no bad side effects, no nausea. Just real tired. Was there quite a bit longer than expected today. Arrived at 12:40 pm and left at 3:40 pm. Shouldn't take that long in the future. Labs, consult with doctor, chemo... should only be about an hour... hour and a half at most.

I'm the first, and only patient at this time, getting this particular drug at Rex Cancer Center. How cool is that... I'm a PIONEER!

The drug is Brentuximab Vedotin, also known as Adcetris.
Seattle Genetics

Port Surgery

2011-10-16T01:00:00.001-04:00

Had my port surgery Friday morning. It was successful... I now have an arm port.

As soon as I got in there I told him I hadn't gotten any sleep and if he gave me anything I might go completely out. This would probably set off my sleep apnea and I would probably start moving around. "Just want to let you know, you have been warned.", I said.

He said we could just do a local instead, if I wanted... instead of a light anesthesia (or twilight). I agreed saying we could always go deeper if we needed.

He gave me the local... and as usual when I get numbed... I started giggling. I was trying so hard not to shake. I had everyone laughing. They're not used to this kind of reaction. It made for a very light and fun surgery for all.

He measured out the line by inserting a wire first, he did mention something about my vein being *something* (I can't remember the word he used, but it wasn't good). Said it was probably because it had been messed with before. *This is the same place I had a port back in 2005.* He threaded the line in, but for some unknown reason, it was a little short. He thinks he knows why, and he would have to start from scratch if he took it out, he tested it and it worked fine. Said it didn't quite make the last bend, but that would give it less reason to kink.

I asked him if he felt confident that it would not be a problem, because if so that's great and I would trust him on it. But if for any reason he felt that a problem of any sort could arise from this... I would be that person, that WOULD be me. That's just how my life goes. He said he felt real good about it, he tested it, and it works just fine. We shall see!! *crosses fingers*

He did say there was a small blood clot at the site where my PICC line had been. He did not seem concerned at all. But I was a little... I had my PICC line removed on July 12th. So just how big had this clot been to still be there now. Figured I needed to call my oncologist as soon as I got home. Since I didn't have any anesthesia they could let me go fairly quickly... and I could walk out instead of being wheeled.

When I got home I called the nurse line and left a message: "Had my surgery, it went fairly well, now have an arm port. While looking at my veins with his machine, he noticed a blood clot at the site where my PICC line had been. He said it was a small clot and he did not seem concerned, but I wanted to let Dr. Olajide know just in case she wanted to increase my Coumadin a little for awhile. If so, just give me a call. Thanks."

It wasn't long before I received a call back... Great catch, that was a very good call and the doctor did indeed want to increase the Coumadin from 1 mg to 5 mg daily. She also wanted me in for labs next Friday to check my INR levels. Thank you very much for calling that in. We should put you to work. *See, I do know what I'm doing*

I heard three different times by three different people today that they should put me to work. Two at the hospital this morning and once by the nurse who called me back. *pats self on back*

Here are some pics I took shortly after arriving home.

These were taken about 4-1/2 hours later.

The bruising at the incision has lightened a little,

but the bruising around the area has spread and

darkened a bit.

Not much pain, just a bruised kind of achy pain... Tylenol takes care of it. Very tired. I napped for a few hours after.

Got up around 11 am Saturday, then napped later in the afternoon for about 1-1/2 hours before being rudely awakened by CJ. I was so out of it. He was looking for my car keys... which dad had because they had gone up to my house, mowed the lawn and got my washer & dryer.

Got up and went out for dinner (mom made mexican), visited with CJ & Bethany. Then Seri came over, dad took her shopping at Kohl's.

Fever, Appts, and Schedule Changes

2011-10-14T01:21:00.001-04:00

On Monday I started running a temperature, it started at 99.4°... then went to 100.1°, then 100.6°. The mass under my armpit is huge and it grew so fast. Very short of breath today. Also swollen, took some water pills.

Tuesday my temp went from 100.3° to 100.7° to 101.2°. Considered calling the on-call doc but figured they'd just tell me to come down to the emergency room and I really didn't feel like getting jacked around there all night. Decided I would just wait to see if it got worse.

It was also my last radiation session... to which I disagreed with the doctor on. I feel we should continue with a few more sessions. The lump is considerably smaller, but you can still feel it really well. He keeps insisting that it's scar tissue from the biopsy incision. Excuse me, but scar tissue doesn't shrink with radiation, which this was doing. Also, he didn't examine or feel it before I had the surgery to know what was there before hand... what we are feeling IS the mass. It's the same mass that has been there, just a smaller version now. Another thing... I have several scars from other surgeries I have had recently and none of them feel like this. But I let it go... I told him I disagreed and let it go, I was done fighting with him about it. Figured I would wait to see if the chemo had any effect on it, if not or if it does at first and then returns, then I will just have to have more radiation... with someone else. You know, I went through this once already back in 2008. I had radiation at the beginning of the year, they evidently did not give me enough and it came back. So I had to go back and get more radiation at the end of the year. This time I got enough and it has not come back in that spot since. One spot of my arm that has been cancer free since the end of 2008! So I kind of know what I'm talking about. I wish that other doctor was still practicing. He was older and got hit by a bus while I was at the end of my treatments. He pulled through but ended up retiring. He got hit pretty bad and it was going to be a long recovery, I guess. I had to meet with someone else my last session.

Wednesday my temp went down... it started at 98.8°, went to 99°, then 99.3° and down to 98.3°. Went to my Chemo Education class, pretty much knew everything she had to tell me. I had already researched the drug and the company. I went to the drug company site, Seattle Genetics (SeaGen) @ http://www.seagen.com/. I went to the FDA site, http://www.fda.gov/AboutFDA/CentersOffices/CDER/ucm268969.htm. I also reviewed a few news articles where the doctors had been interviewed. Oh, and I also read the study information.

Saw the Vascular Radiologist for the consult... he said I would leave there with one port or another. He's going to have both kinds on hand so if he gets in there but ends up not being able to do the arm port for whatever reason... he'll switch right over and do the chest port. I was very grateful, that way I won't have to reschedule for the second attempt and get behind schedule. I have to have a port or PICC line to take the chemo drug. Praying it all goes well and is able to get one or the other.

Thursday my temp crept up to 98.8° then up to 100°.

My chemo was supposed to start on Oct. 20th, but we've bumped it up to Monday, Oct. 17th. Got to get some sleep, have to be up early for the port surgery.

Cancer Recurrence: Catching Up (Part 2)

2011-10-10T02:55:00.001-04:00

This is a continuation of the previous update post and is a summary of what occurred between mid-July thru to the present.

In my previous update, I forgot to include that in June after my 5th or 6th round of chemo my toenail came off. The one next to my big toe on my right foot. I was afraid I was dying or something… at least, that’s what I went out asking mom after it came off.

Here’s a photo of the cake my niece, Cianna, made me. It made me laugh because of either the misinformation or just the innocence of a child’s mind, but it read “No More Cancer” as if I was cancer free. I thought, “Well, we could always hope.”

Roughly two weeks after my oncologist declared that I may be in remission I had a large mass reappear in the back of my right arm. Aug. 4th I had a Punch Biopsy done. It came back negative for the lymphoma, but my surgeon and I both knew that was incorrect and figured we weren’t able to get deep enough with a Punch Biopsy, so we scheduled a Surgical Biopsy for Aug. 15th. He had to go in deeper than anticipated so the incision is pretty long and deep. Got six stitches... kind of looks like a Frankenstein scar, lol. Two days later he called with the results. Positive for the same lymphoma I've been fighting.

See the white ring or lighter ring around the incision area, that's because of the pressure caused by the mass pushing up underneath my skin. It was so tight I was afraid the stitches were going to rip through.

Saw my oncologist on Aug. 24th, she referred me to a radiologist to get started on radiation treatments. She also discussed doing chemo again… she was going to a conference and was going to present my case. Saw the radiologist for a consult on Sept. 2nd. Also had a PFT (Breath Test) to check my lungs… still having extreme shortness of breath. Starting to fear there was permanent damage to my lungs from the chemo or something. Tests showed I have good lung capacity. The nurse giving me the test was surprised, she could hear my shortness of breath just walking down the hall, she also heard the wheezing. When she listened with the stethoscope she realized the wheezing was coming from my throat/esophagus area.

On Sept. 7th I went to Rex Radiology for my Radiation Simulation which is setting up for my radiation treatments. On Sept. 13th I saw my oncologist again, she was told to hold off on the chemo for if and when I really needed it. There is a new drug out now that targets my type of lymphoma, but it just came out and is very expensive. Hopefully if I do eventually need to do chemo again, this is what they want to use and at that time it will come down in cost… but for now just stick to the localized radiation. She also was setting me up to see an ENT about the lump I feel in my throat and the trouble with my breathing. ENT appt not until Nov. 15th. I started radiation on Sept. 14th and I’m scheduled for 17 treatments. I go every weekday at 1:15 pm at the Rex/UNC Radiation Oncology, Rex Cancer Center of Wakefield.

Into my second week of radiation, I noticed the mass under my armpit seemed to be getting bigger, when I saw the radiation doctor that Wednesday I asked for his opinion to make sure I wasn’t feeling more than what was really there. He said he felt something. So I called and scheduled an appointment with Erin on Sept. 27th.

On Saturday, Sept. 24th I had an appointment for my car… the brakes hadn’t been feeling right and figured I should get it in for new brake pads. Joe picked up my car on the way to work (it’s his garage), worked on it during the day, then brought it back to the house. He lives near us and knows what I’ve been going through, I’m friends with his wife also. That was incredibly nice of him to go out of his way like that… and, he ended up needing to replace the rotors too. Then he and his wife gave me a truly amazing gift, he did not charge me a dime… it was a gift from them as a way to help me through my financial struggles. At first I said, “No, you need to feed your family.” But then he went into this spiel about feeling led to do this, situations he’s been in, vague situations his wife had come up against, and that they really wanted to do this. It was so sweet and he sounded a little uncomfortable and he had me tearing up… so I told him, which I have been told, that I needed to be more gracious in accepting gifts. (I’m uncomfortable accepting gifts or help, almost like I don’t deserve it.) So I would accept their gift graciously. I am truly blessed to have people like this in my life. I am blessed in many ways.

On Sept. 27th I saw Erin, she felt the mass. I had an appointment for a PET scan already scheduled for my 3-month check-up, so we just bumped it up from Oct. 5th to Sept. 29th. Erin called the next day, the mass under my armpit lit up… so did the bone marrow in my pelvic area. The cancer has moved into my bone marrow. Fortunately it has just started, it was peppered and not large spots. So after radiation they want to start chemo with that new drug. It was tentatively set up for Oct. 10th, but they wanted to wait 2 weeks after my radiation ended and they needed to get me approved for the drug financially through SeaGen (Seattle Genetics), which I was last Friday, Oct. 7th. So now I’m tentatively set up to start chemo on Oct. 20th.

On Oct. 1st I took my nephew, CJ, driving to teach him to drive a stick shift. He did really well.

On Oct. 4th, mom had to put her cat Fluffy to sleep. She had a brain tumor. Her leg was spasming, found out her pupils were enlarged and she was howling all the time because she was almost totally blind, she started throwing up the night before and did not eat that morning.

On Oct. 5th I saw the radiation doctor again and we decided to extend the radiation treatments for (at least) 3 more sessions. We’ll reassess the situation on Tuesday.

Now that I’m tentatively scheduled to start chemo on Oct. 20th… AND since I found out that my treatments will be every three weeks… AND I’m scheduled for 16 sessions… which means approximately once a month for a year and four months… I have scheduled an appointment with a Vascular Radiologist about getting a port in my arm like I had back in 2005. There is no way in hell I’m going through 16 months of this with a PICC line as first discussed (before I knew the time table). I’m trying for an arm port first, if not, then inquiring about another chest port, then the PICC line would be a last resort… if ALL else fails.

My appointment with the Vascular Radiologist was supposed to be Monday, Oct 10th, but someone screwed up and wrote it on the wrong day, it was put in on Tuesday… but the doctor doesn’t do this on Tuesdays and Monday was all booked up now… so I had to be moved to Wednesday, Oct. 12th. Which I am also scheduled for my Chemo Education class. We also made an appointment for the surgery on Friday, Oct. 14th. just in case we get a thumbs up for the port. We can always cancel if needed.

My oncologist said I should have a bone marrow transplant, but without insurance no one will even discuss it until we have the money. I was told it would run a couple hundred thousand dollars. The procedure itself is about $35,000., then you have doctor fees, hospital fees, medications, follow-up care, etc. So I need to research foundations and organizations to see if I can find any help there, I will also need to raise donations to help fund it. I am in the process of setting something up so that anyone can donate any amount they like through paypal, with a credit card, or bank account, and possibly checks. Even if all you can donate is $5, if I get enough people to donate $5 or $10 dollars... I might just be able to raise enough. I will have the donation button on my blog and will post it on my Facebook page.

Special Note:

My cousin Kelly is having a double mastectomy today. Praying that it goes well.

Cancer Recurrence: Catching Up

2011-10-09T00:01:00.000-04:00

Hello everyone… I know I’ve been out of touch for awhile, quite a bit happened and between medical appointments, work, and being so darn tired I wasn’t able to keep up with emails, Facebook and blogging. So, to start catching you up, here is a summary of what occurred between mid-April thru mid-July.

After my 2nd round of chemo I ended up in Urgent Care with a bronchial infection and missed a whole week of work. The following weekend I was in Urgent Care again for middle ear inflammation. Even though I was suffering from a bronchial infection and middle ear inflammation, the Urgent Care doctor did not give me antibiotics. I was sick, in pain, and was having real trouble hearing. On April 19th I verbally browbeat the after hours answering service for the cancer center into having the on-call doctor call me, even though it was not technically an emergency. He called me in a Z-pak, thank God. Two days later I was in to see my family doctor for fluid in my ears and blood in my urine. I was also having bad pains in my right shoulder and neck area, especially when I coughed.

On April 25th mom had to put her boxer, Sassy, down because of cancer.

On April 27th my Missy Bug died.

Somehow, for some reason, she got over the fence and out front into the road. Mom found her and buried her before I got home, she didn’t want me to see her like that. Missy was my baby girl, it just broke my heart to lose her. I still choke up and cry when I think about her. One day at the end of August, Simon brought a young bunny in through the cat door, I rescued it and tried to warm it up to release in the morning but it ended up dying. I walked down to discard it into the woods at the back of the property, on my way back I spotted the marker mom put at Missy’s grave. I hadn’t been to see it yet, it was still too hard, I cried the whole way back to the house.

On April 29th I went down for my third round of chemo, mom had something going on so my sister, Laura, took me. When they were doing the pre-chemo blood work, I complained about the pain and having a little trouble swallowing. The nurse went and got someone to come look at me… she came, took a look, asked me some questions and said, “We think you have a blood clot.” The sent me directly over to have an ultrasound done. Yep, I had a clot! Poor Laura… this wasn’t what she expected. I was admitted into the hospital immediately with a very large blood clot in my juggler. The clot was branching up towards my head, down my arm, and down towards my chest where the Port was. I was scheduled for surgery on May 2nd to replace my Port. I was in so much pain I was crying… I was on a Heparin drip to thin my blood (which also caused me to swell even more), but the pain was terrible. It wasn’t until late that night when a nurse finally called the doctor and said they needed to be giving me something for the pain. I was put on morphine, then Percocet was added, and eventually a muscle relaxant (can’t remember the name). That went on between Friday night, Saturday, and Sunday. Monday morning I had the surgery to replace my port, but when he got in there, there was so much scar tissue… he said it appeared that my body was rejecting the port. So he removed the port from my chest and put a PICC line in my left arm. When he removed the port a huge part of the clot came out with it, which caused most of the pain to disappear. I had my 3rd round of chemo that evening. I ended up staying two more days, I was released from the hospital on May 4th around 6 PM.

My PICC Line

Port Scars

My swollen feet/ankles/legs. I couldn't wear my shoes, I had to buy a pair that were a size larger so I had something to put on my feet. I also wore my slippers alot.

These are the flowers dad sent me when I was in the hospital... came with a little stuffed cat, but I didn't get a pic of the cat. It's on my shelf now.

My oncologist wanted me off work for two weeks, but I went back a few days earlier on a 6 hour schedule. I was on major blood thinners, one is a shot mom had to give me in the stomach every night. You should’ve seen all the bruises on my stomach. I tired very easily, which is why I wasn’t online for quite awhile... just gettin' through the day was hard enough. The biggest blood clot came out when they removed my port, but I still had three smaller ones that will take awhile to dissolve. They also switched the shots I was taking… from Arixtra to Fragmin. I developed a severe reaction from it, I had yeast all through my system, it was coming out all over. I had a vaginal yeast infection, a yeast infection on my side and under my breast, on my legs between my ankles and my knees, and in my esophagus. It was awful.

Bruise from stomach shot.
(mom felt so bad)

May 20th was my 4th round of chemo. Six days later I was in the Emergency Room for shortness of breath. It was after hours and the PA wanted to be sure a blood clot hadn’t traveled to my lungs. With each round of chemo I was getting more and more short of breath and they weren’t sure if I would notice the difference. It wasn’t a blood clot in my lungs.

Because of the PICC line, they stepped up my chemo schedule from every three weeks to every two weeks.

June 3rd had my 5th round of chemo. This FROG was given to me by another woman receiving chemo. Her name is Michelle Scott and she started collecting frogs, adding the handwritten ribbons and giving them to chemo patients.

FROG = Fully Rely On God

On the 6th I was back in the ER, sat in the waiting room for 5 hours. Finally got out of there about 2:00 in the morning.

June 17th was my 6th and final round of chemo. That evening /early morning, I got so sick and started throwing up. I threw up so hard I pee’d on the bed, down myself, and on the floor… I saw blood in the trash can and thought I was throwing up blood, turned out to be my nose that was bleeding (remember, I’m on blood thinners)… I also broke blood vessels in my eye. So then I had to clean myself up, clean the floor, and change my bed. What a horrible night!

June 30th I had a Nuclear Stress Test on my heart to see if there was any damage done… still trying to find out why I was so short of breath, also had swelling and pressure in my chest area. Tests came back fine… my heart was good. I was put on Hydrochlorothiazide and Furosamide (water pill/lasik) for the swelling, also given Potassium pills.

July 1st I had a PET scan. July 8th I saw my oncologist for the results and follow-up. I was informed that I “appeared” to be in remission. The mass in my lymph node had decreased significantly, although still slightly swollen in size... but that is normal because the node had been stretched very big for a long period of time, sometimes it never goes back to normal size. The lumps in my arm had also disappeared. I was set up to have a PET scan in three months time (Oct), by then it would give us a better idea. That was also my last day at work, I was laid off.

July 12th I had my PICC line removed and had a Doppler (?) to check my blood clots. They were smaller but still there. Had to remain on the crapping blood thinners that make me swell horribly. July 26th I had a D’dimer (?) On July 28th I found out my unemployment was being held up because of a mistake/miscommunication with the staffing company I worked for. I talked with the company the next day and it was cleared up, but it took until September 7th for the unemployment agency to correct it and release my payments.

VA Earthquake Felt In Wake Forest, NC

2011-08-23T15:42:00.000-04:00

Did anyone else feel that one? When it rumbled through, mom and I were eating a late lunch and I was on the phone with my sister, Laura. I said something I won't repeat but was, "What the **** was that?" Our house was shaking and felt like the whole house was actually moving. It shook pretty good, scared the heck out of both of us.

Crazy thoughts were running through my mind... did a plane or vehicle hit the house, was a twister coming through, what was happening?? Mom says, "That felt like an earthquake!"

Laura said it was probably just the guys tearing up the road in front of her house, which is just a few houses down from us. I didn't think it was... not movement like this. But her house didn't shake, she hadn't witnessed what we did.

Then my sister called back and told us she heard there was a quake in VA.

That's pretty confusing and real scary when you have never been through an earthquake and live in area that is not known for them. You stand still because it happens so fast and you don't know what to do because you don't know what is causing it. You're just waiting for something to show itself so you know how to react.

Wow, what an experience... not something I'll likely forget.

Family Photos

2011-08-19T14:58:00.001-04:00

Mom borrowed some family photos taken at our Frisbee Family Reunions. (Click on photos to view larger images.)

In Memory of Sassy - April 25, 2011

2011-06-12T19:56:00.000-04:00

Back at the end of April mom had to put her Boxer, Sassy, down. She started to throw up blood clots and we knew it was going to be pretty bad. She was full of cancer.

Cancer Recurrence: 2nd Round of Chemo

2011-04-09T22:57:00.001-04:00

I went in yesterday thinking I wouldn't be allowed to have chemo because I had been so sick, but weirdly enough, my counts were excellent, liver and kidneys very good... I think it was my liver that she said was better this time than last. Go figure, I guess chemo does agree with me. *lol* I chalk it up to God and all the prayers being sent on my behalf.

So I had my second round yesterday. Mom was able to go in and sit with me this time since flu season is "technically" over. I am doing much better, still dealing with the coughing and chest congestion. For some reason, every morning around 4 am, I go into a coughing jag. I'm glad to be coughing that crap up out of my lungs, but it definitely puts a crimp in my sleeping time.

I'm in new territory now, last time I only had the one round of chemo, then I moved here to NC and my new doctor stopped it.

**SPECIAL REQUEST**
from all my Blog and Facebook friends and family

Back in the beginning of January, an old high school classmate sent me a message on Facebook. He had seen my post about the cancer recurrence, he told me about his wife's cancer and said he'd keep me in his prayers. He was writing me from his wife's hospital room where she was receiving radiation treatments for brain tumors they had recently found. I haven't seen or talked to him since high school, I had some classes with him but didn't really hang out with him; I find it amazing how something like this can cause others to reach out for whatever reasons and it really touched my heart. He's posted a few comments of support, well wishes and prayers. Since I've been so tired and then sick, I hadn't really been on Facebook, not that I was ever on very much before all this, but I was wondering about him and how his wife was doing. Tonight I happened to check out his page before I sent a message to see if any updates were posted and saw that his wife had passed. I would like to request prayers for him in this period of loss and grief. Since you all have been so amazing and supportive for me and it has meant so much... I am hoping that your swell of support and prayers would help him through this awful time. *Since he contacted me privately, I wish to respect his privacy and not identify him by name. Some of my high school Facebook friends may know him and this situation. I know he'll see this post and any support/prayer comments left in regard to him.*

I want to thank all my little online "angels". Hugs and kisses to all! Most of all I want to thank you, Lord, for being my true rock.

Prayer Quilt

2011-04-06T23:09:00.000-04:00

This is a Prayer Quilt, made and prayed over by some wonderful ladies from the Faith Baptist Church in Youngsville, NC. Thank you, ladies.

http://www.faithnc.org/

Cancer Recurrence: What's Been Going On

2011-04-06T00:22:00.000-04:00

I know it's been a few weeks since I last blogged, but I've been really tired. It's hard doing chemo and work.

I had my first chemo session on Friday, March 18th. I was nauseous over the weekend. The prednisone makes me sick to my stomach, but I have to take 5 pills (at one time) every day for 5 days after my chemo. At first I didn't think to take the other pills they gave me... the ones to fight the nausea... but when I did, all was well.

I was notified that I was approved by Merck for the ACT program, which helps pay for meds if you qualify. They're going to cover my Neulasta shots I need after my chemo. It helps boost my immune system so I don't get sick or infections as easily. The shot runs about $7000. a pop. I have to get one every three weeks on the Monday after my chemo. I also qualified for my Aloxi med through the Eisai Patient Assistant Program. This will be a tremendous help also. My Limited Benefit Plan health insurance through the temp agency doesn't cover any of my chemotherapy. At this point, I've maxed out about all my coverage for everything else. REX Hospital qualified me for their Assistance Program, so that's another HUGE help. I still owe several thousand dollars for surgeons, anesthesiology, labs, and such; also, I'm still waiting for bills to come through for a lot of services that didn't initially have my insurance info.

I had to have blood work done on Monday, March 28th, to check my counts... they were so good they had to call and tell me how good they were... she said I should do chemo more often. *lol*

On Thursday, March 31st, my hair started loosening and coming out.

YouTube Video of hair coming out: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nQ7HcmvHubA

On Friday, April 1st, my sister came to cut my hair. A guy I work with said when his mother had chemo, she cut her hair short and it didn't all fall out. I don't know if her chemo was as harsh as mine, but it was worth a try.

Here's little bits of video of my sister, Laura, cutting my hair. (The video is not the greatest, I learned to not let my mom run the digital video recorder)

YouTube Video of my sister cutting my hair: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IYKXA1NvG_0

On Saturday morning I got sick... I got up, had a cup of coffee and a blueberry muffin Laura had brought me the night before. Within a half hour to 45 minutes, all hell broke loose. I don't ever remember being this sick. I was power vomiting and had severe diarhea, and I couldn't get either to stop. My temperature was 101.3 degrees. I couldn't keep meds down or liquids. I called my doctor and she told me to try to get the nausea medicine down, she said she would call in some antibiotics, but I wasn't sure if it was an infection, virus, or just a bad muffin... my first thought was food poisoning or bad blueberries in the muffin. After about two hours things really hadn't changed much except my temperature went up to 102 degrees. So I called her back and asked her to call in the antibiotics. She was thinking that maybe I should be admitted into the hospital, but I told her I wanted to wait until morning to see if there is any change. It took everything I had to keep those meds down so they could get into my system. Finally the nausea meds started kicking in and I was able to start keeping liquids down. I was much better by morning but still in pretty bad shape. I didn't go to work Monday or today.

On Sunday, I got in the shower and so much hair was falling out it clogged up the drain. So mom shaved my head.

How's that for a noggin!

I'm supposed to have another round of chemo this Friday, don't know if they will let me since I've been sick and can't shake this fever. We'll see.

Cancer Recurrence: Surgery For Port Placement

2011-03-08T23:03:00.000-05:00

Surgery didn't go as well as anticipated. Evidently, under sedation, I was thrashing and moving about too much and wouldn't keep my head and neck in position for him to insert the line... he had to put me completely out. Of course, I have no recollection of this, which is odd because last time I was aware and talking (although I did try to nap a few times and woke myself up snoring). This time, all I remember is being wheeled in, looking around, and thinking it looked like a big storage room... then people yelling at me to wake up. This caused the surgery to last longer, they had to put a tube down my throat, I was in recovery longer, and the anesthesia made me dizzy and nauseated.

I'm in a lot of pain and I can't drive on the pain meds, so I'm going to try some Nuprin or Tylenol to see if I can get away with that instead. So far this is the worst of what I've gone thru. This is worse than the bone marrow biopsy. It freakin' hurts! And it's sore, like majorly bruised sore. I feel like I was in a car wreck, or got shot, or something.

"Harry's Law"

2011-03-07T23:29:00.000-05:00

If you're not watching this show... you're missing a darn good one! It's a drama with humor, sarcasm, heart and she's says the stuff we all say in our heads but never out loud. I realize it's on late for a lot of folks, but it's worth watching. Also, they have been running it again on weekends. I've seen it on Saturday and Sunday nights.

Harry's Law - w/Kathy Bates
NBC
Monday @ 10 PM

Also at Hulu.com: http://www.hulu.com/harrys-law

Cancer Recurrance: New Schedule of Appts

2011-03-06T17:46:00.001-05:00

I saw the surgeon, Dr. Eddleman, on Thursday, he doesn't do arm ports. He said they are more prone to problems like blood clots. I explained the debacle with the last port they TRIED to place in my chest, he wasn't sure why they tried placing it so low. He showed me were he would place it. He told me if I felt more comfortable with an arm port, he would refer me to someone that does it and assured me he wouldn't be offended. After talking with him about it and with such the great surgery he did for my biopsy, I agreed to do it his way. Granted, I'm a little nervous about doing this after the last time, and I really don't need one more scar on my chest... but I have faith in him and I trust him.

Here is my latest schedule of appointments.

MON, Mar 7
12 PM
Pre-Surgery Testing
REX Hospital

TUE, Mar 8
7:15 AM
Surgery to place Portacath
Dr. Eddleman

FRI, Mar 11
9 AM
Results & Discussion – Set up treatment
Dr. Olajide

THU, Mar 17
1 PM
Post-Surgical Checkup
Dr. Eddleman

A Cause For Concern: A Presidentional Dereliction Of Duty?

2011-03-01T23:28:00.000-05:00

This should be a cause for concern for every American, this isn't a Left vs Right or Liberal vs Conservative... this is a dereliction of duty! You don't get to pick and choose which laws to defend. If a president fails to defend any law, then I'd say that's an impeachable offense!

From the Family Research Council
Tony Perkins' - WASHINGTON UPDATE

Holder Right There Obama, FRC's Got a Question...

Last week, I shared with you our concern that President Obama is ignoring his responsibilities as President and refusing to defend the Defense of Marriage Act in federal court. But what's even more troubling about the situation is how quickly litigants trying to overturn Proposition 8 in California filed a "Motion to Vacate Stay" in the Ninth Circuit after Attorney General Eric Holder announced that DOMA would be left undefended. Within just a few hours of the DOJ's statement, Ted Olson's team filed a 23-page document that quoted from the Attorney General's letter twice.

The mainstream media may not give this "coincidence" a second thought, but to FRC, this lightning-fast citation of the letter into a major judicial document is highly suspicious. Our concern is that the Department of Justice has been collaborating with the litigants in the Proposition 8 case behind the scenes, so FRC sent a letter to the DOJ asking for record of all correspondence between DOJ and opponents of Prop 8 in the last month. If there is a quiet partnership, the alliance would be both unethical and highly damaging to America 's rule of law.

Regardless of your political leanings, it should be obvious that a Department of Justice that collaborates with opponents of federal law to strike it down is clearly an example of a political system run amok. DOJ's job is to defend laws that Congress enacts--not help to undermine them. To read FRC's letter to the Department of Justice, click here.

http://www.frc.org/washingtonupdate/holder-right-there-obama-frcs-got-a-question

Cancer Recurrence: Bone Marrow Biopsy

2011-02-24T00:05:00.000-05:00

I had my second PET scan on Monday... it went well. Then today I had my bone marrow biopsy. Yeah, I was unprepared for that!

All last evening and this morning I tried not to think about it... denial, great tool when used properly! I knew I'd start getting anxious and worked up... so I settled into denial for as long as possible. About 9:30 this morning I couldn't deny it anymore... I'd have to leave work in an hour... anxiety, nausea, sweaty palms, deep (DEEP )breathing to try to calm my nerves! Oh, and I suddenly became a nervous pee(er)... don't know what that was about. It progressed as the morning went on. I went at 6:30 before I left for work, then 8, I think I went again around 9 am, then 10, then again at 10:30 before I left the office, then at 11 when I arrived at the doctor's office. Good thing my appointment wasn't later in the day... I would have dehydrated!

Mom met me at the doctor's office, I went in to have bloodwork done, then waited nervously. I didn't wait long, they took us back to a room... my temperature was up a tad, my blood pressure... well, that surprised the heck out of me. I expected it to be high because it usually is when I go see the doctor (White-coat syndrome? Nope, traffic-in-city syndrome!), plus with being so anxious and worked up. It was 129... that's it... usually it goes up the 140's. But my heart rate was way up!

So then they get me up on the table (those short table things you sit on when you visit the doctor), on my stomach. They lowered the back of my pants down just past my butt cheeks... this is how casual they are toward this procedure... just a regular doctors office and no changing into a gown.

They prepped an area just above and to the left of my butt crack. She started giving me injections of the numbing stuff, about 4 injections (I think), deeper and deeper towards the bone. The last one felt like it hit a nerve... oh my gosh, how uncomfortable that was. Kind of took my breath away. I thought I was getting another injection, but then I felt it! It was the needle going down and it hit that nerve area... and stayed there! Oh my gosh, it was awful! I was clenched up and breathing hard, I think I was making some sort of groaning noise or something. Then, "Son-of-a-bitch!" exploded out. I didn't know whether to holler or throw up. After a bit, she says, "We're almost done, 2 seconds more"... I'm like ok, 2 secs and it's over, ok... WRONG!... done with the bone marrow part... now she was screwing that thing down to take a core sample of my bone. "SON-OF-A-BITCH!!" She's over top of me, pushing that thing down pretty hard. That intense pressure, the nerve pain, you will just never know... they can numb the tissue around the area, but they can't numb down into the bone. It wasn't a sharp pain like I expected... it was an ongoing, never letting up, heavy pressure, intense "hit-a-nerve" pain. It hurt like a mother-effer! *Excuse the language*

Then I had to sit there for 10-15 minutes with an ice bag against my butt. Mom said I did better than she thought I would, she figured she'd be hearing more cursing than two SOB's. *I was trying really hard not to* They showed us the bone marrow, it looks like thick blood with bits of bone floating around in it. They also showed us the bone sample. That was pretty cool.

They have this little "shop" with stuff for cancer patients there, I stopped and picked up a scarf and two turbins (I call 'em lil' beanie hats). Mom went home and I went back to work. Which I kind of regretted later after the numbing stuff started wearing off, but I needed the hours.

I meet with Dr. Olajide on March 11th to get the results for both tests and my treatment plan.

No Sheeples Here: The President Who Stood By Our Side: My Tribute To Ronald Reagan

2011-02-20T01:10:00.000-05:00

No Sheeples Here: The President Who Stood By Our Side: My Tribute To Ronald Reagan

I just came across this through Supi @ Just an Artist.
Original post from No Sheeples Here.

Click through to see video tribute.

Cancer Recurrence: Update 2

2011-02-19T01:29:00.000-05:00

I received a call today from the doctor's office, I've been scheduled for a PET scan. Dr. Olajide told me she really wanted to do another one since my last one was almost 2 months ago, but my insurance would probably not cover another one since I, more or less, just had one. I also have a consultation set up with Dr. Eddleman for a port to be placed.

I've put this in God's hands. When I agreed to see the radiation doctor, I said, "Lord, I did my part, I said what I felt I was led to say. Now it's up to you to intervene with this doctor."

Time will tell, but I feel that God was speaking to me in that moment, I was obedient even though I figured my doctor would think I was crazy, and now I'm being told from this new doctor that radiation is not right for my situation and that I need to do a harsher chemo than what I thought I would need. She's concerned that it has already started to spread further... so much so that not only am I doing a bone marrow biopsy, but she had them call my insurance company to explain the need for another PET scan... and got it approved.

So now I have a new schedule:

MON, Feb 21
11 AM
PET Scan

WED, Feb 23
11 AM
Bone Marrow Biopsy

THU, Mar 3
1:30 PM
Port Approval/Discussion

FRI, Mar 11
9 AM
Results & Discussion – Set up treatment.

Cancer Recurrence: Update

2011-02-18T01:25:00.000-05:00

Okay, I left off at waiting for the results of my biopsy...

I saw my oncologist for results, discussion and treatment plan. It is the same lymphoma that I've had... which is good news because we aren't dealing with a new "second" form of cancer. My doctor thinks I should do localized radiation.

Wait! What?!

When I first saw him he said we would probably need to do chemotherapy... not the harsh CHOP version like I had before, but a milder form and that I "may not even lose my hair". I told him I thought I should do chemotherapy. He gave me this analogy of "not destroying the whole neighborhood because of one bad neighbor". But my whole neighborhood is messed up... yes, we need to destroy the whole neighborhood... because it's not only under my armpit, but also still on my arm. I have several bumps/lesions on my arm. Also, if it has spread anywhere else but has not yet presented itself large enough for the scan to pick up, then chemo will treat those areas as well. Not that I want to do chemo.. it just sounds like the more logical thing to do in this situation. Plus, I felt it in my gut, so to speak. I felt like God was screaming in my head to speak up... we need to do chemo! He disagreed and wanted me to see the radiation doctor. The doctor would take a look and decide if it was viable for me to do radiation. I guess from the size, position, and whatnot... the doctor may decide that radiation may not be the best course of action. So I agreed to see him.

On January 18th I saw Dr. Anderson. I was told to come in 1/2 hour early... what for, I do not know, since I sat in the waiting room the entire time. Then I sat in an office for 20 minutes... like I have nothing better to do. I understand when you wait in the afternoon, sometimes they get backed up. This was first thing in the morning... first appointment. I felt like giving him an invoice for the time I missed from work!

*rant over*

Anyways, he checked me out, I listened to what he had to say, I told him what I thought, he understood why I felt the way I did and couldn't disagree with my reasoning. He called Dr. Z and, this is where it starts getting bizarre, Dr. Z was going to call a specialist with UNC to discuss my case and the possibility of Chemotherapy Replacement. "This doctor will explain it all but you probably won't want to go this route."

Anyways, I was curious to find out about this "Chemotherapy Replacement". A week went by and I didn't hear anything.

**Began wondering whether Dr. Z was having a tantrum because I questioned him or because I voiced my opinion.**

I called and left a message, nothing. So I called Dr. Anderson, 'cause he told me to if I didn't hear something. They hadn't heard anything either. The nurse called over and then let me know that they were finishing up processing the paperwork for my Bomary transplant and I should hear about an appointment by the following Monday. So I'm getting set up for this appointment and get a call that my insurance won't cover a Bomary transplant and I could appeal the decision but I need to get it started right away. So I say, "What the heck is a Bomary transplant?" She says, slowly and distinctly, "Bone Marrow Transplant". Dead silence on my end... Bone marrow transplant? Yes, the particular chemotherapy I would be doing would warrant me needing a bone marrow transplant. More silence... then I said, "I don't understand... a bone marrow transplant? How did we get from a simple radiation that 'should melt it like butter' to bone marrow transplant?" Which confused her. So I explained what had transpired... initial visit, light chemotherapy... after testing visit, radiation... I disagreed but saw radiation doctor, I voiced my opinion, he called Dr. Z and now we're at bone marrow transplant. She agreed that it didn't make sense. I told her to make an appointment for me to see Dr. Z so we could discuss what was transpiring. She said that he was going to be out of the office for awhile so let me set you up with someone else in the practice. At this point, I'm thinking he intentionally went way over to the other end of the spectrum to force me to do what he wants... radiation. **So now I'm thinking, "Is he really not available or has he decided not to see me anymore because I questioned him? I've been seeing him since 2005... how immature and childish"**

So she made me an appointment to see Dr. Olajide, but she wasn't available until February 15th. I really didn't want to wait another two weeks but what was I to do. By the time I see this doctor, it'll be almost 2 months since my PET scan.

I had my appointment on Tuesday. She looked over my file and checked me out thoroughly, she thinks the mass under my armpit has grown closer to my breast area. I also have a cyst-like mass on the back of my right arm. She said that I need to do chemotherapy, CHOP, like I did before... the harsh stuff where I lost all my hair, made me real tired and made my bones ache. I also need to do a bone marrow biopsy! My lymphoma was indolent (slow-moving), but is moving faster now that it's in my lymph system. A bone marrow biopsy will give her more information and she'll better gauge the extent and duration of chemo that I will need.

Wednesday, February 23rd - Bone Marrow Biopsy
Wednesday, March 2nd - Results/Discussion/Treatment Plan

I also stopped in at the Financial Aid office while I was down there. Hopefully I qualify for some assistance. I owe around $15,000.00 already. And with the real estate market the way it is, I'll be lucky if I break even on my house, that is, IF I ever find a buyer. The realtor wanted to list it at a price that would have had me coming to the table with $2000.00... I don't have $2000. In better days I would have walked away with about $10,000., now I'm hoping and praying for $5000. Most likely I won't see anything. I was depending on that money to pay some of these medical bills. Ain't life grand!

I keep praying for God to send me a buyer with a reasonable offer.

~~ By the way, I was told on Tuesday that Dr. Z took a medical leave of absence. ~~

Fla. judge strikes down Obama health care overhaul

2011-01-31T17:43:00.000-05:00

By MELISSA NELSON, Associated Press

PENSACOLA, Fla. – A federal judge declared the Obama administration's health care overhaul unconstitutional Monday, siding with 26 states that argued people cannot be required to buy health insurance.

Senior U.S. District Judge Roger Vinson agreed with the states that the new law violates people's rights by forcing them to buy health insurance by 2014 or face penalties. He went a step further than a previous ruling against the law, declaring the entire thing unconstitutional if the insurance requirement does not hold up.

Attorneys for the administration had argued that the states did not have standing to challenge the law and that the case should be dismissed.

Justice Department spokeswoman Tracy Schmaler said Monday the department strongly disagrees with Vinson's ruling and intends to appeal.

"There is clear and well-established legal precedent that Congress acted within its constitutional authority in passing this law and we are confident that we will ultimately prevail on appeal," she said in a statement.

The final step will almost certainly be the U.S. Supreme Court. Two other federal judges have already upheld the law and a federal judge in Virginia ruled the insurance mandate unconstitutional but stopped short of voiding the entire thing.

At issue was whether the government is reaching beyond its constitutional power to regulate interstate commerce by requiring citizens to purchase health insurance or face tax penalties.

Vinson said it is, writing in his 78-page ruling that if the government can require people to buy health insurance, it could also regulate food the same way.

"Or, as discussed during oral argument, Congress could require that people buy and consume broccoli at regular intervals," he wrote, "Not only because the required purchases will positively impact interstate commerce, but also because people who eat healthier tend to be healthier, and are thus more productive and put less of a strain on the health care system."

Obama administration attorneys had argued that health care is part of the interstate commerce system. They said the government can levy a tax penalty on Americans who decide not to purchase health insurance because all Americans are consumers of medical care.

But attorneys for the states said the administration was essentially coercing the states into participating in the overhaul by holding billions of Medicaid dollars hostage. The states also said the federal government is violating the Constitution by forcing a mandate on the states without providing money to pay for it.

Opponents of the health overhaul praised the decision Monday afternoon. House Speaker John Boehner said it shows Senate Democrats should follow a House vote to repeal the law.

"Today's decision affirms the view, held by most of the states and a majority of the American people, that the federal government should not be in the business of forcing you to buy health insurance and punishing you if you don't," he said in a statement.

Democrats just as quickly slammed the decision.

"This lawsuit is nothing more than an attempt by those who want to raise taxes on small businesses, increase prescription prices for seniors and allow insurance companies to once again deny sick children medical care," Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., said in a prepared statement.

Former Florida Republican Attorney General Bill McCollum filed the lawsuit just minutes after President Barack Obama signed the 10-year, $938 billion health care bill into law in March. He chose a court in Pensacola, one of Florida's most conservative cities. The nation's most influential small business lobby, the National Federation of Independent Business, also joined.

Officials in the states that sued lauded Vinson's decision. Almost all of them have Republican governors, attorneys general or both.

"In making his ruling, the judge has confirmed what many of us knew from the start; ObamaCare is an unprecedented and unconstitutional infringement on the liberty of the American people," Florida GOP Gov. Rick Scott said in a statement.

Other states that joined the suit are: Alabama, Alaska, Arizona, Colorado, Georgia, Indiana, Idaho, Iowa, Kansas, Louisiana, Maine, Michigan, Mississippi, Nebraska, Nevada, North Dakota, Ohio, Pennsylvania, South Carolina, South Dakota, Texas, Utah, Washington, Wisconsin and Wyoming.

___

Associated Press Writer Curt Anderson in Miami contributed to this report.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20110131/ap_on_bi_ge/us_health_overhaul

Cat Doors Galore

2011-01-06T20:03:00.001-05:00

My dad, bless his heart, got two pieces of plexiglass and glued them together to put a cat door in so they could have an exit out my bedroom window. I didn't want to use a piece of wood and block my whole window.

He also cut a hole in my bedroom door for me so I could put one in so I didn't have to play doorman for my cats... now I can sleep with my door closed.

And check this out... finally tolerating each other. The gray one is my mom's cat, Apollo (we tend to call him Pillow most the time); the black & white is my Simon.

Cancer Recurrence: Biopsy/Surgery

2011-01-05T23:19:00.000-05:00

Yesterday, Jan. 4th:

So... I got up at 4 am to be at the hospital at 5:15 am for my surgery scheduled at 7:15 am! Why I had to be there two hours early? I do not know... Mom & I spent a lot of time sitting and waiting. Seems a little extreme, but... whatever.

I wasn't put completely under, not until he decided if he was able to take the whole mass out, so I was talking to him (felt kind of like in a dream state). I remember, at one point, warning him that I was going to cough because I knew it was going to shake my body. Wanted to make sure he wasn't cutting when it happened. *LOL*

I drifted off a few times and woke myself up snoring... next thing I know they're rousing me and I had to scooch over off the table to the bed. I went into recovery, they got me some water and brought mom in. After about 15 minutes or so they were getting me on my way. I was released around 8:45 am.

The doctor wasn't able to remove the mass, it had become a little bigger and harder and the doctor said it may cause too much nerve damage. We'll have to shrink it first.

I was tired, but felt great. I was ready to go to work, of course, mom wouldn't let me. They had given me a prescription for pain killers, but I never end up using them; so mom & I decided, the pharmacy is right down the road, if we need them she could run down real quick and get them... but no sense spending the money for no reason. Glad we didn't get them, I didn't even need Tylenol or Nuprin... I didn't have any pain what-so-ever. Dr. Eddleman is a great surgeon!

My Incision

He put stitches inside and glued the outside.

Around 5 pm, mom and I noticed that the glue was splitting and my incision was pulling open. One side was gaping and this orangish liquid was starting to drain out. Kind of looked like betadine solution.

Incision Starting to Open

**basically, my breast was too big and heavy and was pulling on the incision, I ended up having to hold my boob up to keep it from splitting completely open**

So we tried taping it up and I called the doctor's service... he quickly called back. Told me he was going into a surgery so he would be at the hospital, but anyone working the ER could take care of it... and that he didn't put betadine in it. *lol* We really didn't want to run all the way to Raleigh so we decided to go to the Wakefield branch. They wouldn't treat me... I had my surgery at Rex Hospital and this Rex branch wouldn't treat me. They wouldn't even look at it before deciding... all they heard was 'surgery this morning, incision opening up' and they didn't want to touch it. They were afraid something was wrong and didn't want a lawsuit! Can you believe that shit!?

So we ended up going all the way downtown Raleigh. They took me quickly into Triage where I told them who my doctor was and that he told me he would be here and that they needed to call or page him, they coded me a 2 (yellow), then sent me into the waiting room. There we sat and waited, and waited. We had arrived around 6:30 pm. I think it was about 8 pm when I went and tried to find out if they had called my doctor. I couldn't get any help. At 8:12 pm I called my doctor's service again to let him know that I was there and I didn't think they were telling him. By 9 pm, I figured he was no longer there. We sat waiting until 9:45 pm. One lady started doing second passes because so many people were waiting for very long periods. When she came across me and my situation... she was very angry that I had been coded yellow and had not been attended to. She said I should have been sent over to Minor care immediately. So she called over and told them to make room for me, then, apparently, she called my doctor... who was still there and getting ready to do an appendectomy. He came over right away and took care of me himself. Mom & I were so surprised to see him walk in. Everybody kept apologizing to me. By this time, half of the incision had split open and it had continued to drain quite a bit. He put a stonger glue on and then (suture) strips for added support. So I had to wear my bra to bed for extra support, which totally sucked!

There was this funny part... the girl was trying to have me sign the disclosures while the doctor was getting the glue and stuff... I was trying to hold my boob up, while trying to hold the chart with the papers to sign, plus trying to sign. As I'm trying to juggle this, I finally look up at her and said, "You wanna hold my boob while I sign this?" She started apologizing and said she would come back, so I ended up signing the paperwork AFTER I was treated.

We got home just after 11 pm. I sent an email to my supervisor letting her know I wouldn't be in the next day.

So that was my day! No... so that was my LONG day!

**Oh, my doctor had asked me in the morning if I had heard back about my PET scan, I told him I hadn't and I suspected they weren't going to call me but have my Oncologist let me know. Well, when I saw him in the ER, he said he called about my scans and they didn't show any masses anywhere else. (At least not to a point where the scan can pick it up... if it has just started to spread, whatever we do for this mass will most likely exterminate anything else that may be too small for the scan to pick up.) So that is extremely good news! They are going to send my biopsy to the Mayo Clinic, which will take a little bit longer to get the results back... but he should have them by next Tuesday for my post-surgery follow-up appointment.

Cancer Recurrence: Reason 2 (from last post)

2011-01-02T23:11:00.000-05:00

Tuesday evening, December 14th, I found a large mass just below my right armpit. I thought, "What the hell is that? ...no, don't have one here (the left side). It's pretty big and I couldn't believe I was just finding it. I called the doctor from work on Wednesday and they set up an appointment for Thursday... which was going to be ugly weatherwise, but I didn't want to wait until the following Tuesday. I didn't tell mom what I'd found, wanted to wait to see what the doctor said. I was concerned because of it's position in the lymph area... I had a bad feeling.

Last December I went in with a swelling at my neck/shoulder area that turned out to be nothing. My doctor wasn't impressed... said I'd have to do better than that. *lol* I was hoping this would be the same.

This time, he was impressed. Actually seemed a little surprised and concerned. I don't think he expected this. He said it was definitely something and it has gone into the lymph system. He mentioned possibly doing a bone marrow test, won't decide until my other tests come in and have a better idea of what we're dealing with. I said, "I hear bone marrow tests hurt!?" He replied, "Well, you know, umm... yeah, it hurts." That's what I love about Dr. Z, he tells me the truth... honest and up front. I stopped at mom & dad's on the way home to let them know what was going on.

I always heard once it hits your lymph system, it's all over with... it spreads like wildfire through your body.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

History

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Some of you are aware that I have Lymphoma (a form of Cancer), and that I have had it going on 12 years now. For those who didn't... It took five years to be diagnosed... it started in 1999, it first looked like ringworm or something akin to it. In 2000, I was treated for ringworm, they lanced it, treated for fungus, shot it with steroids... nothing seemed to clear it up. Then in 2004, Dec. 10, I was sent for a biopsy; on December 29th, I received the call. Cancerous.

At first I was diagnosed as stage 4 and treated with CHOP chemotherapy. Pretty severe. Turned out I was slightly misdiagnosed. The doctor I started seeing down here in NC stopped the chemo and did more tests because things didn't seem right. The original doctor saw spots on my lungs and presumed they were cancerous, turned out those spots were only scar tissue from when I had severe pneumonia in 1991. My lymphoma is rare and indolent (slow-moving), it has stayed on my arm area, only moving from below the elbow to above the elbow over 11 years. Other than the initial chemo, I have had two series of localized radiation a couple of years ago, but that's it. It has been managable, I saw my oncologist once or twice a year, had bloodwork done, a scan once a year for the first three years... the usual "keep an eye on it" stuff.

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

On 12/21/10, I had an initial consultation for a biopsy. We want to make sure this is the same lymphoma or has it mutated, or is it something entirely different.

On 12/22/10, I had a PET scan.

On 12/30/10, I had pre-op testing and consultation.

Tuesday, 1/4/11, I have Biopsy/Surgery. He couldn't do a simple biopsy because of where it is located. He's going to go in to cut out a few chunks for analysis and if it looks fairly clear and easy to excise, he may just take the whole mass out. My surgery is scheduled for 7:15am, but I have to be there at 5:15am... which means mom & I have to leave about 4:30 in the morning. Ugh!!

On 1/11/11, I have a post-op follow-up in the morning, then I meet with my oncologist, Dr. Z for test results and treatment options.

So extra prayers will be much appreciated.

CH-Ch-Ch-Changes!

2010-12-29T23:50:00.000-05:00

December 17th & 18th I moved in with mom & dad... have to sell my house. Actually for two reasons now...

Because I'm not earning quite what I used to before I was laid off from my last job and I was scrimping then.
To be shared soon... a recent situation I've decided to blog through.

Been trying to adjust to my new living quarters... my cats are trying to adjust too, they're not used to anyone but me being around. They're skittish around other people... skittish is putting it mildly. They usually beat it out the cat door if anyone came to the door... or if they heard a vehicle pull in the driveway.

Simon is doing remarkably well, seems to be asserting himself with the "natives" (mom's cats). There have been a few squabbles. Missy is still pretty much hiding in my room, mostly under the covers.

Well, got to get to bed... one more day and then it's a three-day weekend!

I Fought For You: By The Sound Tank

2010-12-07T20:26:00.000-05:00

My dad forwarded this to me.

Terrorism Plot Thwarted... In case you missed it.

2010-11-27T23:16:00.000-05:00

I just recently made a statement about this same subject, Terrorism. It was a comment made in reference to a question on SodaHead. The question was:

Should Bush Be Investigated for Waterboarding? My reply below...

What is it going to take for people to wake up and allow our police, the FBI, the CIA, our military to do what needs to be done to ensure our protection from these vile individuals?

Now I read this...

Oregon bomb-plot suspect wanted 'spectacular show'

By Tim Fought And Nedra Pickler, Associated Press

PORTLAND, Ore. – A Somali-born teenager plotted "a spectacular show" of terrorism for months, saying he didn't mind that children would die if he bombed a crowded Christmas tree-lighting ceremony, according to a law-enforcement official and court documents.

He never got the chance. Mohamed Osman Mohamud, 19, was arrested Friday in downtown Portland after using a cell phone to try to detonate what he thought were explosives in a van, prosecutors said. It turned out to be a dummy bomb put together by FBI agents.

It is the latest in a string of alleged terrorist plots by U.S. citizens or residents, including a Times Square plot in which a Pakistan-born man pleaded guilty earlier this year to trying to set off a car bomb at a bustling street corner. Last month, another Pakistan-born Virginia resident was accused in a bomb plot to kill commuters.

In the Portland plot, Mohamud believed he was receiving help from a larger ring of jihadists as he communicated with undercover federal agents, but no foreign terrorist organization was directing him, according to a law-enforcement official who wasn't authorized to discuss the case publicly and spoke on a condition of anonymity.

The official said Mohamud was very committed to the plot and planned the details alone, including where to park the van to hurt the most people.

"I want whoever is attending that event to leave, to leave dead or injured." Mohamud said, according to the affidavit.

"It's in Oregon, and Oregon, like you know, nobody ever thinks about it," the suspect told an agent in one discussion.

Thousands of people had gathered Friday on a cold, clear night for the annual event at Pioneer Courthouse Square, a plaza often referred to as "Portland's living room" because of its popularity.

Just 10 minutes before Mohamud's 5:40 p.m. arrest, the lighting ceremony began. Babies sat on shoulders, and children cheered at the first appearance of Santa Claus onstage.

The tree-lighting on the bricks of the plaza went off without a hitch just as the arrest was taking place.

Mohamud, who grew up in Beaverton, was a former student at Oregon State University. He had been enrolled in courses from late 2009 until Oct. 6 before withdrawing, said Oregon State University spokesman Todd Simmons.

The law-enforcement official who spoke to the AP on Saturday said agents began investigating Mohamud after receiving a tip from someone who was concerned about the teenager. The official declined to provide any more detail about the relationship between Mohamud and that source.

In an e-mail exchange with an undercover agent Mohamud complained, "I have been betrayed by my family," although he describes no specific action that family members took.

The FBI monitored Mohamud's e-mail and found that he was in contact with people overseas, asking how he could travel to Pakistan and join the fight for jihad, according to an FBI affidavit.

According to the law enforcement official, Mohamud e-mailed a friend living in Pakistan who had been a student in Oregon in 2007-2008 and been in Yemen as well.

For reasons that have not been explained, Mohamud tried to board a flight to Kodiak, Alaska, from Portland on June 14, wasn't allowed to board and was interviewed by the FBI, the affidavit states.

Mohamud told the FBI he wanted to earn money fishing and then travel to join "the brothers." He said he had previously hoped to travel to Yemen but had never obtained a ticket or a visa.

On June 23, an undercover agent contacted Mohamud by e-mail, pretending to be affiliated with the "unindicted associate" Mohamud had sent e-mails to.

The FBI's affidavit says the friend in Pakistan referred him to another associate, but gave him an e-mail address that Mohamud tried repeatedly to use unsuccessfully. The official said FBI agents saw that as an opportunity and e-mailed Mohamud in response, claiming to be associates of his friend, the former student.

The affidavit said Mohamud was warned several times about the seriousness of his plan, that women and children could be killed, and that he could back out. But he told agents: "Since I was 15 I thought about all this" and "It's gonna be a fireworks show ... a spectacular show."

Mohamud, a naturalized U.S. citizen living in Corvallis, was charged with attempted use of a weapon of mass destruction, which carries a maximum sentence of life in prison. A court appearance was set for Monday.

Authorities allowed the plot to proceed in order to build up enough evidence to charge the suspect with attempt. Mohamud sent bomb components to undercover FBI agents who he believed were assembling the explosive device, but the agents supplied the fake bomb that Mohamud tried to detonate twice via his phone, authorities said.

The FBI affidavit says the undercover agent first met Mohamud in person on July 30 and asked what he would do for the cause of jihad. The agent suggested that Mohamud might want to spread Islam to others, continue his studies to help the cause overseas, raise money, and become a martyr or put together an explosion but didn't know how and needed training, the affidavit said.

The undercover agent said he could introduce him to an explosives expert and asked Mohamud to research potential targets.

At a second meeting on Aug. 19 at a Portland hotel, the agent brought a second undercover agent, the documents say, and Mohamud told them he had selected Portland's Pioneer Courthouse Square for the bombing.

On Nov. 4, the court documents say, Mohamud made a video in the presence of one of the undercover agents, putting on clothes he described as "Sheik Osama style:" a white robe, red and white headdress, and camouflage jacket.

He read a statement speaking of his dream of bringing "a dark day" on Americans and blaming his family for thwarting him, according to the court documents:

"To my parents who held me back from Jihad in the cause of Allah. I say to them ... if you — if you make allies with the enemy, then Allah's power ... will ask you about that on the day of judgment, and nothing that you do can hold me back ..."

Friday, an agent and Mohamud drove to downtown Portland in a white van that carried six 55-gallon drums with detonation cords and plastic caps, but all of them were inert, the complaint states.

They left the van near the downtown ceremony site and went to a train station where Mohamud was given a cell phone that he thought would blow up the vehicle, according to the complaint. There was no detonation when he dialed, and when he tried again federal agents and police made their move.

Tens of thousands of Somalis have resettled in the United States since their country plunged into lawlessness in 1991, and the U.S. has boosted aid to the country.

In August, the U.S. Justice Department unsealed an indictment naming 14 people accused of being a deadly pipeline routing money and fighters from the U.S. to al-Shabab, an al-Qaida affiliated group in Mohamud's native Somalia.

Officials have been working with Muslim community leaders across the United States, particularly in Somali diasporas in Minnesota, trying to combat the radicalization.

On Saturday, Omar Jamal, first secretary to the Somali mission to the United Nation and an advocate for Somalis in Minnesota, said Mohamud has a stepmother in Minneapolis. He condemned the plot and urged Somalis to cooperate with police and the FBI.

Jamal said he had spoken to two Somalis who knew Mohamud, and he was described as religious, quiet and innocent. Jamal said Mohamud is from southern Somalia.

"Everybody's afraid, really really afraid," Jamal said of members of Oregon's Somali communities and elsewhere. "They're afraid of, first of all, the label. The allegation is very serious ..."

___

Pickler reported from Washington. Associated Press writers Nigel Duara in Portland, Carrie Antlfinger in Milwaukee and Lolita C. Baldor in Washington also contributed to this report.

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20101127/ap_on_re_us/us_portland_car_bomb_plot

What if the FBI hadn't found out about this? I wonder how many of the politically correct bleeding-heart liberals would now be crying out for retaliation or stronger interrogation if a town full of people, including children, had been murdered for showing up to a Christmas tree lighting? Is that what it's going to take... a tragedy like this!

Election of black conservatives signals 'awakening'

2010-11-05T12:29:00.000-04:00

Chris Woodward and Russ Jones - OneNewsNow - 11/4/2010 4:25:00 AM

With South Carolina's victory of the first 'Deep South' black Republican to Congress since Reconstruction, one conservative thinks it's evident that the tea party is not racist.

Ron Miller, a conservative author, columnist, veteran and tea party member, says Tim Scott's election to Congress is "an impressive victory."

"I think it's a great testimony to Americans' ability to evaluate people by the content of their character, rather than the color of their skin," he suggests.

In winning the election, Scott beat out two white candidates in the Republican primary, including the son of late Senator Strom Thurmond and the son of former South Carolina Governor Carroll Campbell.

"You would think that if there was going to be any state where race would be an issue [it] would be South Carolina. But they've demonstrated their ability, not just with Tim Scott's election, but with Nikki Haley's election as the first female and Indian-American governor of that state, that they're perfectly capable of voting based on the issues," the conservative columnist notes.

He decides the endorsements Scott and Haley both received from the tea party should reject claims that the grassroots movement is racist. Miller also predicts more black conservatives will get involved in the political process in the future.

"We had the largest number of black conservatives run for Congress this year than in any other, and we're going to have two black conservatives in Congress for the first time since 1996," Miller points out. "So we have a beachhead -- to use a military term -- and we want to start using that, not only to show everyone that the black community doesn't think or act alike, [but also] to give black conservatives the courage to speak out and let themselves be heard."

He concludes those are logical goals because no community thinks or acts alike.

Making history for the right reason

Tim Scott was not the only black conservative who emerged victorious on Tuesday. Allen West, a retired Army officer and an Iraq War veteran, won his race for the House and will be representing Florida's 22nd District. Bishop E.W. Jackson, Sr., president of Staying True to America's National Destiny (STAND), points out it is the first time since 1996 that two conservative black Republicans have served in Congress. (Listen to audio report)

"I think that [the elections of] Allen West and Tim Scott are the beginning of an awakening that is already happening all across the country," says Jackson. "But I believe that that awakening is now starting to happen in the black precincts across this country, and I think we're going to see a shift away from the Democrat [sic] Party, which has ill-served the black community for decades now."

While the nation made history two years ago by electing Barack Obama as the first black president, Jackson believes much of that support was misguided.

"I think we were making history for the wrong reasons because we were electing someone [largely] based on emotion, based on wanting to try to move the country forward racially -- as opposed to based on the principles of the man," he observes. "And I think that this year's election is repudiation not of the man, but of his principle and of his policies -- and I think that's a very, very healthy thing."

In addition, Jackson contends the election of Scott and West demonstrates a shift moving away from government dependence. "I think that the black community is just tired of that [message] -- particularly younger black people realize that that's a message that simply does not ring true anymore," he concludes.

http://www.onenewsnow.com/Politics/Default.aspx?id=1223540

Federal Light Bulb Ban Creating Jobs in China, Endangering Americans

2010-10-10T22:15:00.003-04:00

A federal law banning ordinary incandescent light bulbs has already had a negative effect on the American economy — GE has closed its last major bulb producing factory in the United States, creating job opportunities in China.

Legislation enacted in 2007 orders the phase-out of incandescent light bulbs beginning with the 100-watt bulb in 2012 and ending with the 40-watt light in 2014. These bulbs cannot meet efficiency requirements dictated by law.

Compact fluorescent lights (CFLs) are the least expensive alternative. But the manufacture of CFLs is “labor intensive and too expensive to be done at U.S. wage rates,” according to a report from The Heartland Institute, which estimates that domestically produced CFLs would be 50 percent more expensive than bulbs manufactured in China.

So instead of retrofitting its plant in Winchester, Va., to produce CFLs, GE closed the plant in September and laid off 200 workers.

CFLs are already being manufactured in China, and increasing American demand will no doubt create new jobs there.

As the Insider Report disclosed earlier, while CFLs use about 75 percent less energy than incandescent bulbs and last far longer, they cost significantly more, take longer to turn on, can flicker, and contain small amounts of highly toxic mercury, which creates problems for users when they break or need to be disposed of after they burn out.

“Environmental activists and their allies in Washington were either too ignorant of basic economics to see these job losses coming, or they were simply too callous to really care,” said Heartland Institute science director Jay Lehr.

“Either way, compact fluorescent light bulbs in the real world fail to live up to environmental promises, unnecessarily subject American households to toxic mercury, produce poor-quality light, and are sending American workers to the unemployment line.”

And Sam Kazman, general counsel for the Competitive Enterprise Institute, said: “If the new energy-saving technologies being pushed by government are really that good, then we don’t need government to mandate them. And if they are being mandated, that’s a sure sign that they’re not very good.”

Three Republican members of Congress — Joe Barton, Marsha Blackburn and Michael Burgess — have introduced a bill that would repeal the ban on the incandescent bulb.

The three said in an article on The Daily Caller: “The unanticipated consequence of the ’07 act — layoffs in the middle of a desperate recession — is what sometimes happens when politicians think they know better than consumers and workers.”

~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~

CFL Light Bulbs Are Dangerous, Cost Jobs
Tuesday, 28 Sep 2010 09:45 AM
Article By: Michael Reagan

It's should be called the law of unintended consequences, and Congress should learn to abide by it, taking enough time to discover whether the road they choose to follow is smooth or filled with ruts.

Back in 2007, the Congress in their wisdom ruled that starting in the year 2012 the ordinary incandescent light bulbs we've been using for ages must be phased out and completely regulated away by 2014. They are to be replaced by so-called CFLs, those twisted fluorescent gizmos that if dropped become tiny mercury bombs.

Why do away with something we've been using, without problems, for just about forever? Well, because they allegedly contribute to a deadly hazard that exists only in their minds — nonexistent global warming.

Just think, every time you turn on a light you are helping to barbecue the planet, according to Mr. Gore and his fellow global-warming alarmists in Congress.

Shame on you!

Congress totally ignored the warnings that the allegedly wondrous CFLs they want to jam down our throats use high levels of mercury and when they break, as light bulbs tend to do when we drop them, they scatter mercury like shrapnel when a shell explodes.

The clean-up required to undo the damage cause by dropped CFLs is extensive and hazardous as well.

In addition, medical experts warn that when broken, the bulbs Congress favors can cause migraine headaches and even epilepsy attacks. Moreover they are unreliable in colder temperatures, failing to emit much heat, are hostile to such gimmicks as dimmer switches, and their lifespan is limited by being frequently turned on or off.

In addition, in this period of economic uncertainty and growing unemployment, the replacement of our usual bulbs has cost a lot of jobs.

General Electric, for example, has closed factories in Kentucky and Ohio, and has recently announced they are closing their major incandescent factory in Winchester, Va. — a factory that employed 200 of our fellow Americans and the last major incandescent manufacturing facility in the United States.

That's good news for China and other countries that will take up the slack with CFL manufacture, but will also undoubtedly create a new form of bootlegging or, rather, bulblegging.

According to the Heritage Foundation, in an attempt to undo the damage Congress has done with this outlandish regulation, Reps. Joe Barton, R-Texas, Michael Burgess, R-Texas, and Marsha Blackburn, R-Tenn., have introduced the so-called "Better Use of Light Bulbs" (BULB) Act last week.

The act would repeal Subtitle B of Title III of the Energy Independence and Security Act of 2007 — the phase-out of the incandescent bulb.

Said Rep. Blackburn: "Washington banned a perfectly good product and fired hard-working Americans based on little more than their own whim and the silly notion that they know better than the American consumer. Now, hundreds more Americans are looking for work while assembly lines in China are churning out fluorescent bulbs for the U.S. market."

Does anyone in Congress care about the plight of American workers, or are they so deeply embedded in the fantasies of Al Gore that they are willing to put American workers out of work?

Thank God for the oncoming congressional elections. We'll have an opportunity to put out the lights on Capitol Hill for a lot of these crazed ideologues.

Mike Reagan, the elder son of the late President Ronald Reagan, is president of The Reagan Legacy Foundation (www.reaganlegacyfoundation.org), and founder and chairman of The Reagan Group. Look for Mike’s books and other information at www.reagan.com.

http://www.newsmax.com/Reagan/CFLlightbulbsGore/2010/09/28/id/371768

Ray Stevens - The Last Laugh [1980, Shriner's Convention]

2010-09-25T14:40:00.001-04:00

I have been looking forever for this song, only available on the original vinyl record. Was hoping someone would record it off their old album. I found a version, but at a higher speed. She likes it better that way, just wish she'd do another version at the correct speed. Oh well, beggers can't be choosers, I guess.

Here are the lyrics, although I couldn't quite make out a few near the end.

Ray Stevens - The Last Laugh
1980 - The Shriner's Convention Album

In your garage, I will start up my dodge and I'll stick my head in the exhaust. When the doctors arrive and try to revive me, they'll say, "Sorry, we tried but we lost."

And I'll say, "Ah ha ha ha, who's laughing now, I've got the last laugh on you". I'll say, "Ah ha ha ha, you'll be so sorry you treat me the way that you do."

Up on the hill, by the Hollywood sign, it's a great place to end the whole show. I'll leave you a note, tied to my throat, when I jump from the top of the O.

And I'll say, "Ah ha ha ha, who's laughing now, I've got the last laugh on you". I'll say, "Ah ha ha ha, you'll be so sorry you treat me the way that you do."

Bye, bye, baby. I'll leave you the car in my will. Bye, bye, baby. After I drive it over the hill.

Well here I am, with my gasoline can, so just tell me once more you don't care. And I'll memorize that look in your eyes that [[ hupbacle?? worked like a plan ]] or [[ I planned ]]

And I'll say, "Ah ha ha ha, who's laughing now, I've got the last laugh on you". I'll say, "Ah ha ha ha, you'll be so sorry you treat me the way that you do."

I'll say, "Ah ha ha ha, who's laughing now, I've got the last laugh on you". I'll say, "Ah ha ha ha, you'll be so sorry you treat me the way that you do."

So if you know the words I couldn't make out... please leave a comment or email me. And if you know where I can get the song digitally [did I say that right, after I wrote it I started questioning if that's what I was trying to say... it's been one of those weeks... mp3, m4a, wma, wav/avi, wmv, mp4, flv] or on a CD, please let me know, I'd be ever so grateful. Thanks.

How Hot Is It?

2010-09-15T22:21:00.000-04:00

I received this via email... I love it! Thanks Kathy T.

When someone asks how hot it is, send them this.

News Flashback: Muslims Burn Bibles and Destroy Crosses

2010-09-12T11:02:00.001-04:00

Published June 18, 2007 by:
Kimberly West

Christians in Gaza Fear for Their Lives as Muslims Burn Bibles and Destroy Crosses

After defeating their rivals in Palestinian Authority Mahmoud Abbas' Fatah movement, Muslim extremists are focusing their attacks on Christians in Gaza City. Christians in Gaza City have issued an appeal to the international community and a plea for protection against the increased attacks by Muslim extremists.

Father Manuel Musallem, head of Gaza's Latin church, told the AP that Muslims have ransacked, burned and looted a school and convent that are part of the Gaza Strip's small Romany Catholic community. He told the AP that crosses were broken, damage was done to a statue of Jesus, and at the Rosary Sister School and nearby convent, prayer books were burned.

Gunmen used the roof of the school during the fighting, and the convent was "desecrated," Mussalem told the AP.

"Nothing happens by mistake these days," he said.

Father Musalam additionally told The Jerusalem Post that the Muslim gunmen used rocket-propeled grenades (RPGs) to blow through the doors of the church and school, before burning Bibles and destroying every cross they could get their hands on.

Catholic Online reports that the heads of Christian churches in the Holy Land have urged both sides to put aside their weapons, noting that the infighting diverted international attention from the national goal of Palestinian independence.

"This domestic fighting where brother draws his weapon against brother is detrimental to all the aspirations of achieving security and stability for the Palestinian people," they said. "In the name of the one and only God as well as in the name of each devastated Palestinian, many of whom are still dying, we urge our brothers in the Fatah and Hamas movements to listen to the voice of reason, truth and wisdom."

One young woman told the Catholic News Service that she was concerned the Islamic extremists would "enforce a strict dress code, forcing women to wear veils and robes." One Christian teenager spoke to the Catholic News Service on the condition that her name not be used. She said the days of fighting had been "very difficult" but they were "OK now."

"We all hope it will be better, but it will never ever be good with Hamas," she said.

Approximately 2,500 Christians live in Gaza.

CBN Reports--

Leaders of the Christian community in the Strip expressed deep concern over the fate of the Christians living under Hamas. They said most of them wanted to leave Gaza out of fear for their lives.

[Palestinian Authority President Mahmoud] Abbas condemned the attack as barbaric and despicable and blamed Hamas militiamen.

'The torching of the church is one of the fruits of the bloody coup that Hamas staged in the Gaza Strip,' he said.

Several Christian institutions in the Gaza Strip and the West Bank have been targeted by masked gunmen over the past few months.

Sources:

Gaza's Christians fear for their lives, The Jerusalem Post, June 18, 2007, http://www.jpost.com/servlet/Satellite?pagename=JPost%2FJPArticle%2FShowFull&cid=1181813061916 (Christians, Muslims, Islam, Palestine, Hamas, Israel, Terror, Terrorism, Jihad, Gaza)

Catholic compound ransacked in Gaza, The Associated Press, June 18, 2007, http://www.mlive.com/newsflash/international/index.ssf?/base/international-38/118216269043620.xml&storylist=international (Christians, Muslims, Islam, Palestine, Hamas, Israel, Terror, Terrorism, Jihad, Gaza)

Israel Today, Hamas turns on Gaza Christians, June 18, 2007, http://www.israeltoday.co.il/default.aspx?tabid=178&nid=13149 (Christians, Muslims, Islam, Palestine, Hamas, Israel, Terror, Terrorism, Jihad, Gaza)

Christians in Gaza Strip express concern about their future, Catholic News Service, June 18, 2007, http://www.catholic.org/international/international_story.php?id=24422 (Christians, Muslims, Islam, Palestine, Hamas, Israel, Terror, Terrorism, Jihad, Gaza)

Praying for Gaza, CBN News, June 18, 2007, http://www.cbn.com/CBNnews/178934.aspx (Christians, Muslims, Islam, Palestine, Hamas, Israel, Terror, Terrorism, Jihad, Gaza)

http://www.associatedcontent.com/article/285123/christians_in_gaza_fear_for_their_lives.html?cat=9

Christian worshippers attacked in Indonesia

2010-09-12T10:36:00.000-04:00

Christian worshippers attacked in Indonesia
Associated Press Writer

BEKASI, Indonesia – Assailants stabbed a Christian worshipper in the stomach and pounded a minister in the head with a wooden plank as they headed to morning prayers Sunday outside Indonesia's capital.

Neither of the injuries appeared to be life-threatening.

No one claimed responsibility for the attacks. But suspicion immediately fell on Islamic hard-liners who have repeatedly warned members of the Batak Christian Protestant Church against worshipping on a field housing their now-shuttered church.

In recent months, they have thrown shoes and water bottles at the church members, interrupted sermons with chants of "Infidels!" and "Leave Now!" and dumped piles of feces on the land.

Local police Chief Imam Sugianto said Asia Sihombing, a worshipper, was on his way to the field when assailants jumped off a motorcycle and stabbed him in the stomach.

The Rev. Luspida Simanjuntak was smashed in the head as she tried to come to his aid.

"I was trying to help get him onto a motorcycle so we could get him to a hospital," she told reporters in the industrial city of Bekasi, 25 miles (40 kilometers) east of Jakarta.

She said the face of one of the assailants looked familiar.

Indonesia, a secular country of 237 million people, has more Muslims than any other in the world. Though it has a long history of religious tolerance, a small extremist fringe has become more vocal in recent years.

Leading the charge against the Batak Christians has been the Islamic Defenders Front, which is pushing for the implementation of Islamic-based laws in Bekasi and other parts of the nation.

They are known for smashing bars, attacking transvestites and going after those considered blasphemous with bamboo clubs and stones. They also pressured the local government early this year to shutter the Batak church.

Perpetrators are rarely punished or even questioned by police.

President Susilo Bambang Yudhoyono, who relies heavily on Islamic parties in parliament, has been widely criticized in the media for failing to crack down on hard-liners.

But he immediately called on authorities to investigate and to hold accountable those responsible for Sunday's attack.

"We know who's behind it," said Maj. Gen. Timur Pradopo, the police chief in Jakarta, without elaborating. "But I don't believe this is an inter-religous conflict."

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20100912/ap_on_re_as/as_indonesia_christians_attacked

"Taken" - Movie Review

2010-08-20T23:58:00.001-04:00

I just watched "Taken" last night... it was EXCELLENT!!! If you like to see the bad guy get what's coming to him... you'll love this movie. It will have your blood pumping for various reasons. I haven't talked back to a movie like this since "Man On Fire" with Denzel Washington.

Liam Neeson did a superb job playing this role. He kicked some major butt! I was very animated during most of the movie. When his daughter was taken WHILE he was on the phone with her, I could just feel a parents nightmare living this situation. And when he told the dude on the phone, "Let her go now and I won't look for you. If not, I will look for you, I WILL find you, and I will kill you!" you got that he was stating a fact, not just bluffing or throwing out idle threats in the heat of the moment. The guy replies back with, "Good luck.", which comes back to haunt him... I don't want to give away too much for those who haven't seen it. But it is an excellent moment.

I have to admit, very unchristian thoughts and words were all abound. I wanted those guys dead... and not in a civilized way. This movie evokes those primal feelings... that these horrendous people, these scum-of-the-earth, should not and were NOT going to get away with everything you see during his search for his daughter.

"Taken" Movie Trailer

Buy DVD:
- Wal-Mart $9.96
- Amazon.com $11.99
- Buy.com $13.62

New Job Update - One Week Yesterday

2010-07-29T23:56:00.000-04:00

It was a week ago yesterday since I started my new job. So far it's just been mostly training... got to go solo today. As for going solo, one good thing right now is that if we question anything, we can flag it for our tainer to check it before we approve it. Whew... takes a little pressure off.

By "we" and "our" I mean Renee and I. We started together. She was in that group presentation/interview thing I had with the five other people... we both got hired, yeeeaaa! Our offices are right next door to each other... unfortunately she got the one right across the hall from the main door, so she gets that annoyance all day. It's kind of loud with the security beep, the clunk of the unlock and the bang of the door shutting. Plus her doorway is straight across from the door, so everyone walks through looking at her sitting at her desk... no privacy unless she kept her door shut.

My office is about three steps down from hers and I've been able to tune out the noise... I just jam to my music while doing my work. We're on the sixth floor... just wish I had a window. And I haven't figured it out yet or bothered to ask, but several times a day I feel the floor rumbling and vibrating. This is an office building... with like... concrete floors or something. So I got no idea whats going on down on the fifth floor??

It's quite a building... shnazzy building. Very artzy with shiny metal and glass. I had trouble just trying to work the elevator. The button looks like a bolt cover... very deceiving. The entryway is like a small plaza and our parking garage is on the other side of it. So it's like parking in the garage and walking across the patio to the front door. My last job, we were in a small three bedroom starter home with everyone trying to fit their cars in the drive. Most times I would park in the yard. God forbid if we had customers... they had to park wherever they could get their car.

What I love most about this job... I don't have to answer phones while trying to get all my work done. That is draining when you're trying to fill multiple positions, you know, the "wearing many hats" type of jobs or concentrating on something in particular that needs your full attention. You get burnt out and frustrated with the constant interruptions. This position is relatively stress free compared to my past jobs. It might be nice to be a little more laid back for awhile. It also gives me training in a new area to add to my resume. Broadens my future job prospects... you gotta like that!

Green: Obama is a victim of Bush's failed promises

2010-07-23T01:00:00.000-04:00

Received this "article" through email. I went online to verify the article... wanted to make sure the article was for real and the email accurate.

Here's an opinion piece by Chuck Green who writes "Greener Pastures" for the Denver Post Aurora Sentinel...one of the more liberal papers in the country. Additionally, Mr. Green is a life long Democrat...so this is rather a stunning piece...

Green: Obama is a victim of Bush's failed promises
By CHUCK GREEN, Columnist [Aurora Sentinel]
Published: Sunday, February 7, 2010 11:14 AM MST

Barack Obama is setting a record-setting number of records during his first year in office.

Largest budget ever. Largest deficit ever. Largest number of broken promises ever. Most self-serving speeches ever. Largest number of agenda-setting failures ever. Fastest dive in popularity ever.

Wow. Talk about change.

Just one year ago, fresh from his inauguration celebrations, President Obama was flying high. After one of the nation’s most inspiring political campaigns, the election of America’s first black president had captured the hopes and dreams of millions. To his devout followers, it was inconceivable that a year later his administration would be gripped in self-imposed crisis.

Of course, they don’t see it as self imposed. It’s all George Bush’s fault.

George Bush, who doesn’t have a vote in Congress and who no longer occupies the White House, is to blame for it all.

He broke Obama’s promise to put all bills on the White House web site for five days before signing them.

He broke Obama’s promise to have the congressional health care negotiations broadcast live on C-SPAN.

He broke Obama’s promise to end earmarks.

He broke Obama’s promise to keep unemployment from rising above 8 percent.

He broke Obama’s promise to close the detention center at Guantanamo in the first year.

He broke Obama’s promise to make peace with direct, no pre-condition talks with America’s most hate-filled enemies during his first year in office, ushering in a new era of global cooperation.

He broke Obama’s promise to end the hiring of former lobbyists into high White House jobs.

He broke Obama’s promise to end no-compete contracts with the government.

He broke Obama’s promise to disclose the names of all attendees at closed White House meetings.

He broke Obama’s promise for a new era of bipartisan cooperation in all matters.

He broke Obama’s promise to have chosen a home church to attend Sunday services with his family by Easter of last year.

Yes, it’s all George Bush’s fault. President Obama is nothing more than a puppet in the never-ending, failed Bush administration.

If only George Bush wasn’t still in charge, all of President Obama’s problems would be solved. His promises would have been kept, the economy would be back on track, Iran would have stopped its work on developing a nuclear bomb and would be negotiating a peace treaty with Israel, North Korea would have ended its tyrannical regime, and integrity would have been restored to the federal government.

Oh, and did I mention what it would be like if the Democrats, under the leadership of Nancy Pelosi and Harry Reid, didn’t have the heavy yoke of George Bush around their necks. There would be no earmarks, no closed-door drafting of bills, no increase in deficit spending, no special-interest influence (unions), no vote buying (Nebraska, Louisiana).

If only George Bush wasn’t still in charge, we’d have real change by now.

All the broken promises, all the failed legislation and delay (health care reform, immigration reform) is not President Obama’s fault or the fault of the Democrat-controlled Congress. It’s all George Bush’s fault.

Take for example the decision of Eric Holder, the president’s attorney general, to hold terrorists’ trials in New York City. Or his decision to try the Christmas Day underpants bomber as a civilian.

Two disastrous decisions.

Certainly those were bad judgments based on poor advice from George Bush.

Need more proof?

You might recall that when Scott Brown won last month’s election to the U.S. Senate from Massachusetts, capturing “the Ted Kennedy seat,” President Obama said that Brown’s victory was the result of the same voter anger that propelled Obama into office in 2008. People were still angry about George Bush and the policies of the past 10 years, and they wanted change.

Yes, according to the president, the voter rebellion in Massachusetts last month was George Bush’s fault.

Therefore, in retaliation, they elected a Republican to the Ted Kennedy seat, ending a half-century of domination by Democrats.

It is all George Bush’s fault.

Will the failed administration of George Bush ever end, and the time for hope and change ever arrive?

Will President Obama ever accept responsibility for something — anything?

Chuck Green, veteran Colorado journalist and former editor-in-chief of The Denver Post, syndicates a statewide column and is at chuckgreencolo@msn.com

Big News... New Job... Starts Wednesday!

2010-07-19T23:59:00.002-04:00

Since I haven't posted in awhile... let me catch you up. I didn't get that job I blogged about earlier... the 500 resumes, phone interview, application packet, video interview. I was disappointed. Anyways...

I had an interview last Monday... actually a presentation with five of us interviewees, then one-on-one interviews. There were three men and two women. The company is looking to hire a couple of individuals. We were referred by a temp/staffing agency. I called the agency Friday, but no decision had been made.

This morning I got the call... Can you start Wednesday? Less than I was previously making, but a little more than the "I hope to make at least" figure. And it's not way downtown Raleigh... it's in Northern Raleigh... which makes for an easier commute from how far out I am. Just take Capital down to 540, short run to Six Forks exit, then a hop, skip, and a jump down the road.

I must admit... I immediately had a small anxiety attack. It's been 18 months since I got laid off. It took 15 months to get even one interview. That does a number on you psychologically. I feel really out of the loop professionally. Plus, it's a MUCH bigger company in a bigger city than I'm used to. I'm not sure if I have the right wardrobe... the small companies and type of companies I've worked for had very casual dress requirements (casual/jeans/sweats/shorts). This place is business casual... I have no idea what I'm gonna wear!

My sister Laura, my friend Danette, and I went to the "Red Lemon" (DQ) to celebrate. Danette bought me a cone... thank you Danette.

Jimmy Carter Cake

2010-06-25T20:00:00.000-04:00

Don't know where the name comes from, always assumed it was because of the peanut butter... but the peanut butter is the smaller equation compared to the pudding and whip cream. Chocolate Peanut Butter Dessert or Reese's Dessert seems more fitting... but this is what I've always known it as. You call it what you like.

Jimmy Carter Cake

First Layer: Mix
1 cup flour
½ cup melted margarine/1 stick of butter (your choice)

Pat into 9x13x2 glass dish. Bake 20 minutes @ 325°. Cool.
This is a fairly thin crust so just push and pat with your fingers until bottom of pan is covered.

Second Layer: Mix
1 cup Cool Whip
1 brick (8 oz.) Cream Cheese, softened
1/3 cup Peanut Butter

Spread onto cooled crust layer.

Third Layer: Beat
(2 pkgs) 3.4 oz. instant Vanilla Pudding
(1 pkg) 3.4 oz. instant Chocolate Pudding
2 ½ cups milk

Pour over second layer.

Top with remaining Cool Whip and garnish with chopped nuts or chocolate shavings (or both). Refrigerate.

Another Tiring Day and More Job News

2010-06-22T23:50:00.000-04:00

Another tiring day... or evening. My sister is selling her house and is in the process of moving. Still too hot to be doing all this moving and cleaning. Sweating buckets... constantly wet and uncomfortable. Such is life. Hopefully we'll get finished up tomorrow.

Still have another load or two... DO NOT know where she's gonna put it! New house is crammed full. It's gonna take her six months to go through and unpack and organize everything.

Before I left to go help my sister, I received a call from the job I'm hoping to get. Wanted to know if I was still interested... they hadn't received my application packet yet. This freakin' town sucks when it comes to mail and shipping. I dropped my packet in a FedEx box on Friday and they still hadn't received it... I'm pretty sure the label they sent me was an overnight label. I let her know I had sent it out and I appreciated her calling. She said if it doesn't come in tomorrow then she'll send me the application through email. She did want to set me up for an interview though... so I have one on Thursday morning at 10 am.

I could kick myself... I usually make copies of everything. I wanted to make a copy of my application and the FedEx tracking number, but I was in such a hurry to get it out ASAP that I didn't. I could of just scanned it in and emailed it to her today. The one time I don't do something turns out to be the one time I needed it!! Isn't that just the way.

I'm very glad that they are interested enough in me that she called... she could have just tossed my resume aside thinking, "She must not be interested." That gives me alot of hope that I may get this job!!!

Thank you Lord for watching out for me.

Today Was A Good Day

2010-06-17T23:52:00.083-04:00

My Air Conditioning Crisis:

The AC guy came about 9:30 am and it took roughly 2 hours for him to do what he needed to do to replace that part. (The doo-hickey part is a TXV Valve) He said he was certain this would fix the problem. I wanted to believe... but was afraid to trust. I had struggled so much the last four weeks that I couldn't believe it was finally going to be over.

I left the house about 2 pm. The temperature had dropped from 86 to 80 degrees. The humidity had dropped from 55% to 52%. I set the thermostat to 76 degrees. When I returned home at 8:30 pm... it was 76 degrees and there was no ice buildup. WOOHOO!!!

After suffering in upper 80 and 90 degrees temps in here... 76 feels pretty darn cold!

On The Job Front:

I received a call on Tuesday from an employer I sent my resume to. We had an initial interview over the phone. She said she received approximately 500 resumes, out of those she decided which ones would get initial phone interviews. I was one of the chosen ones... out of 500! If I make the cut from the phone interview, then I would be FedEx'd a packet with information and an application. From those it would be decided who will get, I believe she said, video conference. Then, from those, individuals would be chosen for a face to face interview. I was so excited and nervous that I can't remember exactly. The home office is in Massachussetts, she would fly down for those interviews.

Well guess what came today?!! I GOT A FEDEX PACKET!!! Yea me!

I'm going to get it filled out and sent back immediately. So say a prayer and keep your fingers crossed.

Welcome To My World... I'm In Hell!

2010-06-15T22:30:00.001-04:00

I came home tonight... it was about 9 pm. I opened the door to an oven. It was like walking into Hades. The thermostat needle was buried, I couldn't even see it. I checked the thermometer in my bedroom/office and it said 96 degrees.

This is now week 4 since I started having problems with my central air conditioning. Still haven't figured out what the problem is... although we think we may have found the answer, hopefully. It's a part he had to special order, he expedited the order and is supposed to be in around 10 am tomorrow. I need prayers... lots and lots of prayers... that this is it. It's supposed to stay in the 90's all the way through Sunday!

It doesn't blow very cold, it freezes up, I turn it off to thaw, after it runs so long it only blows 'just barely cool' air so it isn't sufficient in cooling the house down very much. So I've developed a strategy. Although Missy and I SUFFER through the day, I wait until about 7 or 8 pm when the outside temp starts coming down, then I open the windows and put the box fans in. This brings the temp inside down to the low 80's, it takes a few hours. Then after midnight when the temp is more manageable, I close up the windows and put the air on. That way it has a better chance of cooling it off a little bit to the upper 70's.

Here's some pics of the unit frozen up.

Slightly Frozen

(see that piece in the middle... that's the doo-hickey)

Major Freezing... look how thick the ice is!

These are the filters.

At first he thought it was a piece in the outside unit that was recalled or something because it wasn't working right... the part would be replaced free, but the work to get to it and make the new piece fit wouldn't be. It was expected to run about $500.00. So before he went to that extreme he wanted to try a few things first... which meant dragging this hell out further than anticipated. I don't know all the technical stuff, but this part he changed out first was what allows the freon to run through to where it's supposed to. Mine looked pretty rough and he wasn't getting good pressure readings, so it looked like it could be the culprit. NOT!

Then he was going to try replacing the motherboard, then a doo-hickey on the inside unit that regulates the freon in there. That was last week. By Friday I was trying to get hold of him to tell him to do both, I can't take dragging this out any longer. I had a feeling it was the inside doo-hickey and wanted that replaced first. Well when he showed up this morning he tells me that he thinks it's that doo-hickey thing too and he talked to his dad (whom he took over the business from) and his dad feels pretty sure it's the doo-hickey thing too. That's the part he just expedited... it's a $100 part.

So I'm saying a prayer and keeping my fingers crossed! Besides, I'm tired of eating cereal all the time 'cause it's too hot in here to cook.

Here's Missy trying to stay as cool as possible. I've been worried about her in this heat. She's got all that fur. I've got the ceiling fans on high and I've pointed a box fan towards her sleeping spot on the desk.

Her sprawl cracks me up. There's a ceiling fan right above her.

Here's a pic of some weeds I picked... they were cute weeds. Looked like tiny mini-daisies.

Here's Missy on the file cabinet.

And here I have the fan over her sleeping spot on the desk.

Here's the flower arrangement I did to replace the pretty weeds.

Missy's Chair

2010-05-26T00:08:00.001-04:00

I've posted Missy in her chair a few times... it's always been HER spot.

UNTIL NOW...! (uh oh)

Simon has lost his 'fear' of the chair and has decided it is quite comfy.

Then along comes Missy expecting to settle down into HER chair.

She was not too pleased with what she found!

Then later, after she got HER chair back... Simon comes back from a trip outside to find his seat had been 'stolen' back. Regardless, he tries to also settle in. Really cute!

Aren't they just adorable?!

Look What I Made!

2010-05-25T03:15:00.000-04:00

Chocolate Chip Bread Pudding

(Here's a close-up)

Cornish Hen Half & Veggie Pasta

My Latest "Gift"

2010-05-23T23:57:00.000-04:00

It was delivered Friday evening...

Trying to catch and release it was such a joy! I don't know what it is with Missy and her bugs, frogs, lizards, and snakes. At least Simon brings me the fuzzy and furry "normal" gifts expected from cats.

I love my cats... I love my cats... I love my cats.

They're lucky I love them!!!

"Grey's Anatomy" - Season 6 Finale

2010-05-21T21:18:00.001-04:00

For anyone who missed last nights 2-hour "Grey's Anatomy" season finale… you missed one of the best finales I have ever seen. Granted I sobbed for two hours, but that's beside the point. In my opinion, it was the most emotionally traumatic, heroic, stunning, jaw-dropping, powerful, heartfelt, tragic, hold your breath finale ever! I'm all geared up for the "LOST" series finale on Sunday… but not sure if they will be able to deliver the emotional roller-coaster ride "Grey's" provided. I'm hopin' for the best… but, WOW!... "Grey's" left me stunned and speechless for quite some time.

In case you missed it, you can watch the episodes here:

ABC.com - Grey's Anatomy: http://abc.go.com/shows/greys-anatomy
Grey's Anatomy - s06e23 - Sanctuary (Season Finale P1)
http://abc.go.com/watch/greys-anatomy/93515/261783/sanctuary-finale-part-1?cid=fullepisodeaccess
Grey's Anatomy - s06e24 - Death And All His Friends (Season Finale P2)
http://abc.go.com/watch/greys-anatomy/93515/261805/death-and-all-his-friends-finale-part-2?cid=fullepisodeaccess

Hulu.com - Grey's Anatomy: http://www.hulu.com/greys-anatomy
Grey's Anatomy - s06e23 - Sanctuary (Season Finale P1)
http://www.hulu.com/watch/148529/greys-anatomy-sanctuary#s-p1-so-i0
Grey's Anatomy - s06e24 - Death And All His Friends (Season Finale P2)
http://www.hulu.com/watch/151241/greys-anatomy-death-and-all-his-friends#s-p1-so-i0

Nancy Pelosi... What a superscary whack-job!

2010-05-20T02:18:00.000-04:00

If this wasn't bad enough...

Nancy Pelosi asking the church to preach amnesty.

Ohhhh... so it's "separation of church and state" EXCEPT when Pelosi wants them to preach on something she supports.

Then comes this...

Pelosi Says It's Okay To Quit Your Job... Go Be Creative... Taxpayers Have Got Your "Health Care" Back.

Here's a more in depth debate on same issue.

This woman is un-freakin'-believable!

College Has Become a Consumer Fraud

2010-05-17T19:18:00.001-04:00

College Has Become a Consumer Fraud
Monday, 17 May 2010 09:59 AM
By: Ronald Kessler

College catalogs are as enticing as brochures for shiny new cars. They promise intellectual stimulation, critical thinking, and preparation for a rewarding life. But like come-ons for underwater land, the claims of liberal arts colleges are bogus.

Socrates, Aristotle, and Plato began the liberal arts tradition of learning in ancient Greece. They advocated systematic reflection and a search for truth. The term liberal arts itself comes from the Latin word liber, meaning free.

Today, colleges impose rigid conformity. Rather than encouraging students to find the truth for themselves, they propagandize, usually with a far-left cast. Rather than encouraging open-mindedness, they promote stereotypical thinking and adherence to preconceptions and dogma.

In short, a college education — at roughly $40,000 a year — has become a consumer fraud.

The corruption of college has taken place over decades. That is why some of the most brilliant and successful figures dropped out of college or never attended in the first place.

Bill Gates, co-founder of Microsoft, left Harvard after two years. Socichiro Honda, founder of Honda Motor Co., left home at 15 and never got a degree, which he said would be “worth less than a movie ticket.”

Henry Ford dropped out of school at the age of 16. Edwin H. Land, who brought the world the Polaroid camera, polarized sunglasses, and 3-D movies, left Harvard University after his freshman year. F. Scott Fitzgerald dropped out of Princeton.

William Faulkner dropped out of the University of Mississippi. Mark Zuckerberg created Facebook from his Harvard dormitory, but after the social networking website exploded in popularity, he quit school and became a full-time entrepreneur.

To placate his parents, Michael Dell enrolled at the University of Texas. He began buying remaindered, outmoded IBM PCs from local retailers, upgrading them in his dorm room, then selling them. Eyeing the burgeoning inventory piling up in their room, Dell’s roommate moved the parts to the door and suggested that Dell move out.

Dell did—and decided to drop out at the end of his freshman year.

Others who dropped out of high school or college include Larry Page (Google), David Geffen (Geffen Records), Steve Jobs (Apple), Richard Branson (Virgin), Ralph Lauren (Ralph Lauren), and Jerry Yang (Yahoo).

In fact, one in five billionaires never finished college. Nine presidents, including George Washington, Abraham Lincoln, and Harry S. Truman, never earned a college degree.

To be sure, genius will never make its home in a structured learning environment. Thomas Edison rebelled against school and was told by his headmaster he would “never make a success of anything.”Albert Einstein could not read until he was seven. He hated school and dropped out at 15.

One of his teachers told him, “You will never amount to anything.”

But if colleges encouraged the kind of innovative thinking they profess to nurture, they would attract, rather than repel, brilliant minds.

More important, they would stop turning out cookie-cutter graduates who cannot think outside of the box.

Michael Dell and Bill Gates dropped out of college precisely because they wouldn’t — or couldn’t — tailor their thinking to the prevailing wisdom.

“I took one course that was remotely related to business — macroeconomics,” Dell has said. “One of the things that really helped me is not approaching the world in a conventional sense,” he said. “There are plenty of conventional thinkers out there.”

As practiced today, the very heart of the academic approach is flawed. In the political sciences, that approach entails postulating a theory and shoe-horning reality into it.

For example, Myra G. Gutin taught a course on first ladies at Rider University in New Jersey. In her book “The President's Partner,” she sorted first ladies into three categories: ceremonial (Bess Truman, Mamie Eisenhower), whose role was said to be mostly entertaining; emerging spokeswoman (Jacqueline Kennedy, Pat Nixon), who promoted issues important to them; and activist (Eleanor Roosevelt, Betty Ford).

While such theories give academics something to write about, they distort rather than illuminate the truth. Like racial stereotyping, placing labels on people focuses attention on apparent similarities while shifting attention away from differences.

Instead of promoting conventional thinking, Gutin should encourage students to examine for themselves what each first lady was like. Michael Dell did not come up with his revolutionary concept for manufacturing computers to order by adopting the prevailing wisdom. Thinking outside the box requires looking at the world without blinders.

As a college student, I rebelled against that mind-constricting conformity. After crusading against formal education as an editor of the Clark Scarlet at Clark University in Worcester, Mass., I took my own advice and dropped out after my sophomore year.

My parents were not pleased. They were not exactly strangers to the academic world. My father was an associate professor of microbiology at Columbia University’s College of Physicians and Surgeons and a professor of chemistry at City College of New York. My stepfather was a physicist at MIT. My mother, a concert pianist and composer, taught at the Juilliard School in New York.

But on the school paper, I had found my passion, investigative reporting. I had written an article exposing rampant discrimination against black students by local landlords. When I called a sample of those who had placed classified ads in the local paper, almost 40 percent admitted they would mind if my roommate was black and said they would not rent to me.

The Worcester Telegram picked up the story, and the Massachusetts Commission Against Discrimination began an investigation.

Rather than regurgitating what my professors told me, I learned I could uncover original information on my own. Rather than using it to write papers that no one would read, I realized I could have an impact on society by exposing the truth.

After becoming a reporter on the Worcester Telegram, I went on to the Boston Herald, The Wall Street Journal, and The Washington Post, which I left in 1985. Published last year, “In the President’s Secret Service: Behind the Scenes With Agents in the Life of Fire and the Presidents They Protect” is my 18th book.
I have never regretted my decision to drop out of college. Since then, college has become more doctrinaire. At least 90 percent of college professors are registered Democrats. That would not be a problem if they honestly sought to open students’ minds rather than brainwashing them.

While exceptional professors still exist, portraying Republicans as evil, Americans as Nazis, and capitalism as a way to subjugate minorities is the norm in too many college classes. Protected by tenure, professors replicate themselves, blackballing teachers who do not have ultra-liberal views.

If “the truth will set you free,” America is in serious trouble.

Ronald Kessler is chief Washington correspondent of Newsmax.com. View his previous reports and get his dispatches sent to you free via e-mail. Go here now.

Obama Healthcare Claims Were a Sham

2010-05-17T18:48:00.000-04:00

Obama Healthcare Claims Were a Sham
Thursday, 06 May 2010 11:35 AM

By: Ronald Kessler

A year ago, President Obama promised that his healthcare reform “could save the nation more than $2 trillion over the next 10 years and save hardworking families $2,500 in health care costs in the coming years.”

Since that time, Obama has claimed hundreds of times that the legislation would “bend the cost curve.”

All along, Republicans said Obama was making up figures. Now we know who was right.

An analysis by Obama’s own Department of Health and Human Services says that, rather than reducing costs, the healthcare legislation that was passed “will increase national healthcare spending by $311 billion from 2010-2019.”

While healthcare amounts to 17 percent of GDP now, it will cost 21 percent by 2019, the report from Obama’s own administration says. The increased costs will be as much as $500 billion higher if Congress — as expected — overturns planned cuts in Medicare spending.

Moreover, although 34 million people will gain coverage under the law, 23 million will remain uninsured, according to the analysis. People who choose to go without insurance and employers who do not provide required coverage will pay $120 billion in penalties from 2014 to 2019.

Richard S. Foster, the chief actuary of Medicare and Medicaid who prepared the report, says the reason his analysis did not come out before the bill was passed is that he “didn’t have access to the reconciliation legislation itself until it was publicly issued on March 18, which was three days before the House vote took place on March 21. Because of the complexity of the reconciliation changes, it wasn’t possible to estimate the package prior to the vote.”

In other words, the White House, which claims to endorse transparency, had no interest in telling the public the real costs of the bill until after it was passed. Otherwise, it would have made sure that Foster received the appropriate information in time to prepare an analysis.

Back in 2003, when President Bush made a 16-word statement in his State of the Union speech that British intelligence believed Saddam Hussein had been trying to buy uranium from Niger, the media unleashed its full fury on him. Each day brought new page one headlines insinuating that Bush had lied.

In fact, not only did the British intelligence service MI6 believe that Saddam had sought uranium from Niger but also investigations by both a British House of Commons and a Senate intelligence committee later concluded the MI6 report was well-founded.

Now it turns out Obama misled the country about a measure that affects one-fifth of the economy, yet there is no outrage except from Republicans. The news media have treated the story as a non-event.

The New York Times played the story on Foster’s report on page A8. The Washington Post and USA Today did not run a story. With the exception of Fox News, none of the networks touched it.

If Obama were a company that advertised such false claims, the Federal Trade Commission would take action. If Obama were a Republican, the news media would play his deception as a scandal.

But Obama is neither. He is a pitchman who has victimized the American people with his sham reform.

Ronald Kessler is chief Washington correspondent of Newsmax.com. View his previous reports and get his dispatches sent to you free via e-mail. Go here now.

"LOST" - Across The Sea

2010-05-16T01:35:00.000-04:00

May 11 Episode: Across The Sea

I've had difficulty with this episode... torn between liking it and not-so-much. The episode, in of itself, was interesting... getting more background on Jacob and MIB... but I'm not sure I'm liking some of the implications. I'm trying to think things through, but I keep coming back to, "One day you can make up your own game and everyone else will have to follow your rules." If this turns out to be one big game that Jacob made up... then I'm gonna be extremely irritated. It's almost like... Mother liked you best and I got stuck with this stupid job; I'm not gonna be stuck here by myself! Like a petulant child throwing a temper tantrum.

I just cannot accept this and I refuse to believe that's what all this has been about.

Anyhoo... here's my random thinking on the whole smoke-monster thing. MIB is NOT the smoke monster... the smoke monster has been imitating him all those years like he is doing with John Locke now. We now know that Jacob retrieved his brother's body and laid him to rest next to his surrogate mother in the cave (and I so thought that island Adam and Eve was going to be Rose and Bernard left behind in the 70's), just as we know Locke's body was laid to rest by Ilana, Ben, Sun, and Lapidus. The smoke-monster took on some personality and mindset of it's hosts, previously MIB (wanting to get off the island), just like it is doing now with Locke (don't tell me what I can't do).

So the smoke-monster seems to be an entity in of itself, whether it already existed or was formed by the entrance of a life into the water-cave? I'm not sure, but leaning more toward already existed. Was it bad beforehand or was it corrupted by absorbing traces of anger, lying, deceit and murder through it's host?

And what about the destruction of the well and the camp... Mother did that?? Looks more like the work of a smoke-monster!

How many of you think that Claudia's ghostly appearance might actually be a smoke-monster appearance?

Obama Threatens Veto of Obamacare...

2010-05-14T01:53:00.003-04:00

I thought this article was very interesting...

Obama Threatens Veto of Obamacare as Cost Estimates Soar Above $1 Trillion
Wednesday, 12 May 2010 12:44 PM

Reacting to the surprise announcement that congressional budget referees now predict healthcare reform could top $1 trillion, the Obama administration threatened Wednesday to veto parts of its own healthcare bill.

The politically explosive revelation, which is likely to give new impetus to the GOP’s repeal movement, came after the Congressional Budget Office (CBO) said the law potentially could add at least $115 billion to government healthcare spending over the next 10 years.

This comes after a separate Medicare office report found that the bill would raise spending by about 1 percent during the next decade. Still the Office of Management and Budget (OMB) stood by the administration's original claims that the law would reduce the deficit. Obama tasked Congress with making that happen through tax increases or spending cuts. If that doesn’t happen, the administration is vowing to make program cuts itself.

OMB spokesman Kenneth Baer said Wednesday that the healthcare law "will reduce the deficit by more than $100 billion in the first decade, and that will not change unless Congress acts to change it. If these authorizations are funded, they must be offset somewhere else in the discretionary budget.

“The President has called for a non-security discretionary spending freeze, and he will enforce that with his veto pen."

House Minority Leader John Boehner, R-Ohio, said the new CBO analysis "provides ample cause for alarm," according to a report on ABC News.

"This comes just weeks after the Obama administration itself released an analysis confirming that the new law actually increases Americans’ healthcare costs," Boehner said. "The American people wanted one thing above all from healthcare reform: lower costs, which Washington Democrats promised, but they did not deliver. These revelations widen the serious credibility gap President Obama is facing."

Meanwhile, Jennifer Hing, spokeswoman for Republicans on the House Appropriations Committee, told Fox News: "If Congress were to approve all of this new discretionary funding authorized in the healthcare bill, almost all of the administration's highly touted savings would be made null and void."

If Congress approves all the additional spending called for in the legislation, it would push the 10-year cost of the overhaul above $1 trillion — an unofficial limit the Obama administration set early on.

The CBO said the added spending includes $10 billion to $20 billion in administrative costs to federal agencies carrying out the law, as well as $34 billion for community health centers and $39 billion for Indian healthcare.

The costs were not reflected in earlier budget office estimates, although Republican lawmakers argued strenuously that they should have been. Part of the reason is technical: the additional spending is not mandatory, leaving Congress with discretion to provide the funds in follow-on legislation — or not.

"Congress does not always act on authorizations that are put into legislation by drafters," Baer explained. "Authorizations for discretionary spending are not expenditures."

Congressional estimators also said they simply had not had enough time to run the numbers. Costs could go even higher, because the legislation authorizes several programs without setting specific funding levels.

The healthcare law provides coverage to some more than 30 million now uninsured, offering tax credits to help buy health insurance through new competitive markets that open for business in 2014. When Congress passed the bill in March, the CBO estimated the coverage expansion would cost $938 billion over 10 years, while reducing the federal deficit by $143 billion.

Media Ignore La Raza Immigration Protester Fomenting Violent Revolution

2010-05-12T23:08:00.000-04:00

**NOTE - This man is a high school history teacher!

Media Ignore La Raza Immigration Protester Fomenting Violent Revolution
By Lachlan Markay - Mon, 05/10/2010 - 14:45 ET

Which is more newsworthy: hearsay accounts of racial slurs unsupported by video evidence of the alleged incident, or video of a protester calling for violent revolution against the federal government, the imposition of socialism, and the annexation of the Southwestern states for Mexico?

If you chose the latter, you're probably not a journalist of the self-proclaimed "mainstream" variety. The legacy media has been largely silent on video of Los Angles schoolteacher at a La Raza protest of the recently-passed Arizona immigration law literally calling for the violent overthrow of the United States government.

"There's 40 million potential revolutionaries north of the border, inside the belly of the beast," Los Angeles high school history teacher Ron Gochez told a frenzied crowd, referring to the 40 million Latin Americans in the United States. He went on to claim that teaching or writing a book "is not part of the movement," and that his followers needed to go a step further -- to literal revolution.

video link: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yGqPo5ofk0s

Does this man represent a fringe element of the pro-illegal immigration protesters? Probably. Has an individual's fringe status ever stopped the media from reporting on the outlandish things a couple Tea Party attendees have said? Of course not. Often those statements are taken as evidence that the movement is nothing more than a bunch of potentially-violent racists clinging to their God and guns.

The clip above shows a man actually advocating violence. There is no ambiguity about it. He obviously has a deep hatred of capitalism -- which can reasonably be described as far more radical than a deep hatred of socialism. And this man is a high school history teacher!

The response from the mainstream press: [crickets].

Where are the journalists that were so worried about political violence stemming from the Tea Party?

Why is Mark Potok of the Souther Poverty Law Center not appearing all over cable television to decry the anti-government violence La Raza is advocating?

Where is Bill Clinton to pontificate on the dangers of heated rhetoric and the potential that it could spill over into actual violence? And where are all the media talking heads that were so eager to parrot the former president's politicized warnings?

The alleged spitting incident on the steps of the Canon House Office Building was enough to whip media liberals into a frenzy. With the N-words supposedly hurled at Rep. John Lewis, it made for a perfect anti-Tea Party media meme, despite the total lack of evidence supporting the claims.

MSNBC's prime time lineup was one four-hour doomsaying sermon on the dangers of "right-wing extremism." But so far that channel is eerily silent on this man's heated calls for a violent uprising.

Pictures of a sign at a Tea Party rally quoting Thomas Jefferson's famous "water the tree of liberty with the blood of patriots and tyrants" statement were paraded around as an undeniable sign that the Tea Party movement was out to overthrow -- violently, if necessary -- the political order.

Leftist accounts of the Tea Party are replete with accusations of racism. But where is the outrage over this La Raza protester's use of the phrase "frail ... white people"?

Even Sarah Palin's use of crosshairs on a map of November's target congressional districts was touted by many media liberals as a sign that conservatives have an inherently violent attitude towards politics. And yet, the same journalists haven't drawn any similar conclusions about the radical pro-illegal immigration movement that, as we've just seen, actually calls for violent revolt.

For those who have been paying attention, this double standard is hardly shocking. But the video of this man literally fomenting revolution and advocating violent imposition of socialism -- and the media's virtual silence -- serve as a powerful reminder of the legacy media's never-ending quest to discredit conservatives.

—Lachlan Markay is an associate with Dialog New Media. Make sure to follow him on Twitter.

http://newsbusters.org/blogs/lachlan-markay/2010/05/10/media-ignore-la-raza-immigration-protester-fomenting-violent-revolut

Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer - On A Roll!

2010-05-12T22:38:00.000-04:00

First the immigration bill... now this bill! You go, girl!!

Arizona gov. signs bill targeting ethnic studies

Jonathan J. Cooper, Associated Press Writer – Wed May 12, 6:23 am ET

PHOENIX – Arizona Gov. Jan Brewer has signed a bill targeting a school district's ethnic studies program, hours after a report by United Nations human rights experts condemned the measure.

State schools chief Tom Horne, who has pushed the bill for years, said he believes the Tucson school district's Mexican-American studies program teaches Latino students that they are oppressed by white people.

Public schools should not be encouraging students to resent a particular race, he said.

"It's just like the old South, and it's long past time that we prohibited it," Horne said.

Brewer's signature on the bill Tuesday comes less than a month after she signed the nation's toughest crackdown on illegal immigration — a move that ignited international backlash amid charges the measure would encourage racial profiling of Hispanics. The governor has said profiling will not be tolerated.

The measure signed Tuesday prohibits classes that advocate ethnic solidarity, that are designed primarily for students of a particular race or that promote resentment toward a certain ethnic group.

The Tucson Unified School District program offers specialized courses in African-American, Mexican-American and Native-American studies that focus on history and literature and include information about the influence of a particular ethnic group.

For example, in the Mexican-American Studies program, an American history course explores the role of Hispanics in the Vietnam War, and a literature course emphasizes Latino authors.

Horne, a Republican running for attorney general, said the program promotes "ethnic chauvinism" and racial resentment toward whites while segregating students by race. He's been trying to restrict it ever since he learned that Hispanic civil rights activist Dolores Huerta told students in 2006 that "Republicans hate Latinos."

District officials said the program doesn't promote resentment, and they believe it would comply with the new law.

The measure doesn't prohibit classes that teach about the history of a particular ethnic group, as long as the course is open to all students and doesn't promote ethnic solidarity or resentment.

About 1,500 students at six high schools are enrolled in the Tucson district's program. Elementary and middle school students also are exposed to the ethnic studies curriculum. The district is 56 percent Hispanic, with nearly 31,000 Latino students.

Sean Arce, director of the district's Mexican-American Studies program, said last month that students perform better in school if they see in the curriculum people who look like them.

"It's a highly engaging program that we have, and it's unfortunate that the state Legislature would go so far as to censor these classes," he said.

Six UN human rights experts released a statement earlier Tuesday saying all people have the right to learn about their own cultural and linguistic heritage, they said.

Brewer spokesman Paul Senseman didn't directly address the UN criticism, but said Brewer supports the bill's goal.

"The governor believes ... public school students should be taught to treat and value each other as individuals and not be taught to resent or hate other races or classes of people," Senseman said.

Arce could not immediately be reached after Brewer signed the bill late Tuesday.

"Separation of Church and State" Misunderstanding

2010-05-12T02:25:00.000-04:00

Where did “separation of church and state” come from, and what does it mean?

Most people believe this phrase was in the original U.S. Constitution, but it was actually first expressed in a private letter by Thomas Jefferson. Since then, especially in recent times, it has sadly been misused to slowly, but surely, eliminate Christianity from the public sector—and replace it with an anti-God religion.

The often-misused First Amendment states: “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof . . . . ”

This was intended to protect the church from the federal government, not government from the church.

Want a more in-depth answer? See article below...

from Answers Weekly

Separation of Christianity and State

by Ken Ham, President/CEO, AiG–U.S.
May 3, 2010

Almost all Americans have heard the phrase “separation of church and state.” It has been used as something of a club to “beat down” and eliminate Christianity from public places, including symbols (like crosses), disallow Bible reading and prayer in public schools, and stop the teaching of creation in science classes.

Now, where does the phrase “separation of church and state” come from? It is not a part of the original U.S. Constitution of 1787, as most people falsely believe, or in any of its amendments. In reality, the idea of a “wall of separation” between church and state came from a private letter from President Thomas Jefferson, and it has sadly been misused to slowly, but surely, eliminate Christianity from the public sector—and replace it with an anti-God religion.

The Establishment Clause in the First Amendment was intended to protect the church from the (federal) government, not the government from the church. Therefore, no “national” church or religion is allowed to be established by the federal government.

I will highlight key words of the First Amendment:

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof . . . .

You can see that the “separation of church and state” phrase is nowhere in the Amendment (or the rest of the Constitution). The 1802 letter from Jefferson was sent to the Danbury Baptist Association in Connecticut in response to the group’s letter to him. Jefferson was trying to assure the Baptists that the federal government would never be permitted to interfere with the church. In fact, in his letter, Jefferson states:

Believing with you that religion is a matter which lies solely between man & his god, that he owes account to none other for his faith or his worship, that the legitimate powers of government reach actions only, and not opinions, I contemplate with sovereign reverence that act of the whole American people which declared that their legislature should make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof, thus building a wall of separation between church and state.1

Today, secular scholars have lifted the Danbury letter out of its entire historical context and have turned the so-called “wall” metaphor completely on its head.

“Separation of church and state” is now used to protect the government from the influence of the church—establishing a policy of freedom “from” religion, which in reality has become “separation of Christianity and state.” This would have been an entirely foreign and unintended concept to the Founding Fathers.

This misrepresentation of the Constitution was witnessed once again as I attended a debate in March, in which Rev. Barry Lynn, a liberal minister, lawyer, and the head of Americans United for Separation of Church and State, spoke. Not only did he argue for separation, but claimed that government “neutrality” towards Christianity was his group’s aim. Sadly, most Americans (Christians included) have also been duped into believing that the so-called “separation of church and state” requires eliminating the Christian God and creating a neutral situation. But there is no such position as neutrality. Indeed, one is either for Christ or against Him (Matthew 12:30)!

The religion of naturalism (atheism) has been imposed on the public education system, and on the culture as a whole. For instance, science textbooks in the public schools now typically define science as naturalism (atheism):

Science requires repeatable observations and testable hypotheses. These standards restrict science to a search for natural causes for natural phenomena . . . . Supernatural explanations of natural events are simply outside the bounds of science.2

In keeping with this pronouncement, these books teach molecules-to-man evolution, based only on unproven natural processes, as fact! In other words, they have eliminated the supernatural and replaced it with naturalism. In reality, they have eliminated the Christian worldview and replaced it with a secular, atheistic one!

Sadly, because many Christians have falsely believed that there can be a neutral position, and have also been duped regarding the so-called “separation of church and state,” they are not prepared to boldly and unashamedly stand on the Word of God as they confront issues like abortion, “gay” marriage, racism, etc. By shrinking back, believers have allowed the secularists to impose their anti-God atheistic religion on the public schools—and the culture as a whole.

Answers in Genesis has launched its “I am Not Ashamed” campaign to challenge Christians to publicly and unashamedly stand on the Word of God. Only then, from the basis of the Bible’s absolute authority, will Christians be able to effectively combat the immorality that plagues our nation.

For more information on AiG’s “I am Not Ashamed” campaign, see our special insert stapled inside this newsletter or go to our new website of IAmNotAshamed.org.

Footnotes

1. Thomas Jefferson, Jefferson’s Letter to the Danbury Baptists, The Library of Congress website.

2. Neil A. Campbell, Brad Williamson, and Robin J. Heyden, Biology: Exploring Life, Florida Teacher’s Edition (Upper Saddle River, New Jersey: Pearson Prentice Hall, 2006), p. 38.

http://www.answersingenesis.org/articles/au/separation-of-christianity-and-state#

Jefferson's Letter to the Danbury Baptists

The Final Letter, as Sent

To messers. Nehemiah Dodge, Ephraim Robbins, & Stephen S. Nelson, a committee of the Danbury Baptist association in the state of Connecticut.

Gentlemen

The affectionate sentiments of esteem and approbation which you are so good as to express towards me, on behalf of the Danbury Baptist association, give me the highest satisfaction. my duties dictate a faithful and zealous pursuit of the interests of my constituents, & in proportion as they are persuaded of my fidelity to those duties, the discharge of them becomes more and more pleasing.

Believing with you that religion is a matter which lies solely between Man & his God, that he owes account to none other for his faith or his worship, that the legitimate powers of government reach actions only, & not opinions, I contemplate with sovereign reverence that act of the whole American people which declared that their legislature should "make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof," thus building a wall of separation between Church & State. Adhering to this expression of the supreme will of the nation in behalf of the rights of conscience, I shall see with sincere satisfaction the progress of those sentiments which tend to restore to man all his natural rights, convinced he has no natural right in opposition to his social duties.

I reciprocate your kind prayers for the protection & blessing of the common father and creator of man, and tender you for yourselves & your religious association, assurances of my high respect & esteem.

Th Jefferson
Jan. 1. 1802.

http://www.loc.gov/loc/lcib/9806/danpre.html

If you're interested...

Jefferson's Letter to the Danbury Baptists
The Draft and Recently Discovered Text

http://www.loc.gov/loc/lcib/9806/danpost.html

AND...

'A Wall of Separation'
FBI Helps Restore Jefferson's Obliterated Draft

You get the writer's opinion in this article... but some of the facts are very interesting. For example:

"One of the nation's best known advocates of religious liberty, Leland had accepted an invitation to preach in the House of Representatives on Sunday, Jan. 3, and Jefferson evidently concluded that, if Leland found nothing objectionable about officiating at worship on public property, he could not be criticized for attending a service at which his friend was preaching. Consequently, "contrary to all former practice," Jefferson appeared at church services in the House on Sunday, Jan. 3, two days after recommending in his reply to the Danbury Baptists "a wall of separation between church and state"; during the remainder of his two administrations he attended these services "constantly."

Jefferson's participation in House church services and his granting of permission to various denominations to worship in executive office buildings, where four-hour communion services were held, cannot be discussed here; these activities are fully illustrated in the forthcoming exhibition. What can be said is that going to church solved Jefferson's public relations problems, for he correctly anticipated that his participation in public worship would be reported in newspapers throughout the country. A Philadelphia newspaper, for example, informed its readers on Jan. 23, 1802, that "Mr. Jefferson has been seen at church, and has assisted in singing the hundredth psalm." In presenting Jefferson to the nation as a churchgoer, this publicity offset whatever negative impressions might be created by his refusal to proclaim thanksgiving and fasts and prevented the erosion of his political base in God-fearing areas like New England.

Jefferson's public support for religion appears, however, to have been more than a cynical political gesture. Scholars have recently argued that in the 1790s Jefferson developed a more favorable view of Christianity that led him to endorse the position of his fellow Founders that religion was necessary for the welfare of a republican government, that it was, as Washington proclaimed in his Farewell Address, indispensable for the happiness and prosperity of the people. Jefferson had, in fact, said as much in his First Inaugural Address. His attendance at church services in the House was, then, his way of offering symbolic support for religious faith and for its beneficent role in republican government."

http://www.loc.gov/loc/lcib/9806/danbury.html

"LOST" Fans - Jorge Garcia (Hurley) Interview

2010-05-11T18:30:00.002-04:00

Jorge Garcia On the "Tiring ... Wet ... Perilous" 'Lost' Finale & More (VIDEO)

"LOST" Fans - Useless Trivia

2010-05-10T01:38:00.001-04:00

I was watching a rerun of "Grey's Anatomy" tonight, s04e05 - Haunt You Every Day, the Halloween episode where the dude takes a chainsaw to his own foot and Meredith took her mom's ashes to the hospital in a baggy... when I saw the kid that needed new ears. As soon as I saw him I thought... that's David, Jack Shephard's kid!

His name is Dylan Minnette and he's been in alot... or so I found out when I checked on IMDB to verify.

On another note... on a different "Grey's Anatomy" episode, s02e24 - Damage Case, John Cho from "FlashForward" plays an intern from another hospital that fell asleep at the wheel thus causing an accident that killed someone.

Speaking of "FlashForward"... I noticed that Jack Davenport who plays Lloyd Simcoe is the same guy who played Norrington in the "Pirates of the Caribbean" trilogy... and when I rewatched "The Wedding Date" I noticed he was the groom, Ed, marrying Kat's sister.

Missy & The New(t)est Gift

2010-04-27T00:30:00.001-04:00

Missy sleeping in her chair. She is spoiled.

The other day I was working on my computer. Then, after a quick trip to the bathroom, I come back to both of my cats crouched down below my chair. Instantly piquing my curiosity... you can tell when your furry friends have got something. I turned on the overhead light for better inspection. This is what I found...

I grabbed a papertowel, picked it up, went out the back door, and trotted off to the wooded area out back where I let it go.

When I went back to my computer I discovered something else...

Oh, good Lord!

It's missing tail... and it was moving! It was twitching and curling. Pretty freaky! Especially when I was trying to pick it up.

Come to think of it... I just took the garbage out because something was stinking up the kitchen. I couldn't remember putting anything in it that would make such an awful smell... until just now!

Later in the evening I was doing laundry. I was trying to fold this comforter to put away and Missy was trying to crawl on it as I was trying to fold it. So I laid it down where she promptly settled for a snooze.

Pasta & Italian Sausage w/ Spinach, Onion, Garlic Sauce

2010-04-18T23:46:00.000-04:00

I made this tonight for dinner. I was expecting to use whole wheat pasta, but when I opened the cupboard, I noticed I had some leftover tri-color pasta (plain/tomato/spinach) that was taking up space and decided to rid myself of it instead.

It's pasta and Italian sausage with a sauce/not sauce of EVOO, spinach, garlic & onion. **I say sauce/not sauce because it's not something you want to ladle on... just enough to toss and coat the pasta.**

I cooked some Italian sausage earlier, and had it resting. I also had the pasta boiling.

Then I put some olive oil down in a small saute pan (this time I used Red Pepper flavored EVOO), added diced onions, frozen chopped spinach, fresh chopped garlic, and a couple of shakes of rosemary, basil, crushed red pepper flakes, garlic salt and pepper. When it was ready, I took half the saute mixture and put it in my Magic Bullet with a splash or two of fresh olive oil and puréed it. Added that back into the pan. I wanted to maintain some chunkiness to the sauce with the the onions and spinach.

I sliced one of the sausages in half lengthwise and cut it up into bite-sized pieces. Put that back into the pan I had cooked it in, added a few spoons of the sauce, then threw in a couple spoons of pasta. Mixed thoroughly, plated, and added a couple shakes of shredded parmesan cheese. Waa-laa! Dinner is served.

Deee-licious!

...and you know the leftovers are going to be just as good!

"LOST" - Everybody Loves Hugo

2010-04-16T04:04:00.004-04:00

Apr. 13 Episode: Everybody Loves Hugo

At Libby's gravesite, Hurley is wearing a brown t-shirt... swoosh to the flash-sideways, he's still wearing brown, but now it's a casual dress shirt. Just thought it was interesting...

Back to the island and in the middle of a disagreement with Ilana... BOOM!.. she blows up. Poor Hurley... second time he's been traumatized by someone blowing up while they're off on a tangent. And what the heck do you think is in that bag he picked up out of Ilana's stuff?

The last time we say this bag, Ilana was putting Jacob's ashes into it.

Then we saw Miles getting Jacob's story like he was reading a bag of tea leaves.

Is that what Hurley saw when he opened it, Jacob's ashes... or was there other stuff too? Why the heck would Hugo keep a bag of dust? He didn't know it was Jacob's ashes... he was at the Temple. So, again, what's the deal with Ilana's bag?

Then there's Desmond! This calm, collected Desmond is a little unsettling, albeit in an interesting 'I wanna know what he knows' way. In previous episodes, Desmond always reminded me of one of those small yappy dogs that shake all the time. Always chaotic and "I don't know what's going on, I'm just trying to get through it and survive'. Now it's like he's driven with some sort of specific purpose and I want to know what he's thinking! What's his game plan? He went with Sayid... and now John, way too easily.

When Hurley blew up the "Black Rock"... whoa, dude! Miles: "Warning might have been nice there, Hugo." Hurley's response... "I did say run." LMAO!! Note: Hugo says, "Dead people are more reliable than live people." Tell that to John Locke! The dead people that were talking to him were manipulating liars.

The appearance of the "wild-child"... this time a dark-haired boy carrying a staff... wearing the same outfit the blonde boy was wearing. The way he smiled at Desmond...? Like he was pleased... about what? That Desmond was here and things were going according to plan, or maybe just pleased that John was so irritated with his presence? John was none to pleased to see this kid, it really seemed to irk him; unlike the blond boy, whom didn't smile, but turned and ran with John right behind him.

Random thinking... 2 boys, one blond, one dark. ???
Jacob - MIB
Jack - Sawyer
Aaron - Charlie Hume

My mind keeps wanting to go back to Aaron and what his significance was. Early on it was stressed that it was important that only Claire raise him...

Claire's First Visit W/Psychic (video)

Claire's Second Visit W/Psychic (video)

Claire's Third Visit W/Psychic (video)

Lost - s01e10 - Raised By Another: In her "dream" John said, "he (the baby) was your responsibility, but you gave him away, Claire. Everyone pays the price now." He looked up and one eye was a black stone, the other a white stone.

Claire's Dream (video)

What's up with that?? What happened to all that? What about Aaron and his role in all this?

I've been reading and listening to other people's (blogs/podcasts) and some seem to question what Alpert asked Hugo to ask Jacob about the island. What is the island? They're like... oooo, what does that mean? Uh, the island is the cork! Remember the metaphor Jacob gave Richard in Ab Aeterno. Richard was testing Hurley... he didn't believe Jacob was there talking to Hurley... so, prove it, Hurley; what did Jacob say the island is?

I gasped when MIB/NotLocke pushed Desmond down the well... I wasn't surprised that he'd do something like that, just didn't expect it.

Notice that Desmond said he had a son, Charlie. Charlie doesn't exist in this time 'whatever'. Then when Desmond ran John Locke down... hoo-wee! Did not expect that. Thought he wanted to talk with Locke. My mind is spinning over this one.

Eclair Cake

2010-04-15T02:16:00.002-04:00

Eclair Cake

1 Lb. (box) Graham Crackers
2 - 4 Oz. (instant) French Vanilla Pudding
3½ C. Milk
9 Oz. Cool Whip

Butter bottom of 9"x13"x2" baking pan. Line pan bottom with graham crackers. Mix pudding and milk until thickened, fold cool whip into mixture. Pour 1/2 of mixture over cracker layer, smooth, then add second layer of graham crackers, then pour remaining pudding and smooth, cover with third layer of crackers. Refrigerate for 2 hours. Frost.

Frosting:
6 Tbsp. Powdered Cocoa
2 Tsp. Light Karo Syrup
2 Tbsp. Soft Margarine
3 Tbsp. Milk
2 Tbsp. Oil
2 Tsp. Vanilla
1½ C. Powdered Sugar

Mix well, spread over top layer of graham crackers. Refrigerate finished product for 24 hours.

"LOST" - Rose & Bernard

2010-04-13T21:09:00.000-04:00

Note: I have brought this up, a few times... What happened to Rose & Bernard when the bomb went off? Did they get left back in 1977?? And that I think the cave "Adam & Eve" is Rose & Bernard.

Well check this out! I came across this and thought WOW!!

When Sawyer, Kate, and Alex were rescuing Karl from the brainwashing room there was some speech you couldn't make out through the noise. I came across a video of that being played backwards and the voice says:

"Only fools are enslaved by time and space."

Someone states in a comment that it is an anagram for, "Bones of Nadlers may lay lost deep in cave."

Rose & Bernard's last name is Nadler.

Here is the link to the brainwashing room video:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KZmAz86uHq4

"LOST" - Happily Ever After & My Ramblings

2010-04-10T19:34:00.003-04:00

Apr. 6 Episode: Happily Ever After

OH MY... OH MY GOSH!!! My mind is racing over so much information.

Someone's blog had mentioned that the island time and the flash-sideways were bleeding more and more into each other every episode. I wasn't really buying it... until last week when Sun looked into the mirror. I mentioned it in my last "LOST" post, her look was just... odd.

Well now I'm a believer. And I'm also wow'd by the fact that I had just re-watched s3e8: Flashes Before Your Eyes and how the interaction of Desmond with Charles Widmore and Eloise Hawking jumped out at me in a way they didn't the first time.

I was not surprised when Desmond walked into Charles Widmore's office as his right-hand man... kind of got the feeling when he was in the limo. Exactly what I would expect from "LOST".

The MacCutcheon scotch keeps showing up... when Desmond meets with Widmore in his office in the flash-sideways.

In Season 3, Episode 8: Flashes Before Your Eyes...

...on the island when Hurley and Charlie got Desmond drunk to find out his secret.

Also in his flashback when Widmore told Desmond, "Because you, Hume, will never be a great man."

Also at the bar after breaking up with Penny.

Oh, and check out the art piece on the wall in Widmore's office... it's like a child's rendition of the Dharma barracks... a cabin, the fence, the jungle surrounding, the monster behind the fence, namaste written backwards across the top almost like we're see the backside of the painting, and a man hanging down from the top.

Oh, huh... upon closer inspection it's a polar bear, not a monster... and the upside down man is an upside down statue, I believe.

There's other paintings of similar style... would like to see a close-up of those.

Also noticed how Desmond seems to move between the chairs and the artwork moves from one wall to another. At first Desmond is in the chair on the right and the bar is on the wall to his right. Then he looks to his right and the paintings that were to his left are now on the wall to his right, you also see he is now sitting in the left chair. Notice the picture behind his head is really dark... look at the next pic and now it's an entirely different picture and the bar is now beside him on his right. Does this mean something or is this just bad staging that no one picked up on in editing.

On a side note - Why didn't it ring any bells with Charlie when he was on the island and they found the hatch... if this weird conversation with Desmond about hatches, a computer and a button on an island had happened (after the meeting with Widmore), you'd think he'd have a nagging déjà vu kind of thing that would have evoked that memory.

The event hardly seems forgetful.

I wonder, did Desmond and Penny name their son Charlie after Charlie Pace or Penny's father, Charles? I choose to believe it was after Desmond's friend, Charlie Pace, who, in a sense, brought them back together.

Back to this episode... when Desmond and Charlie crashed into the water and Charlie put his hand up...

...and Desmond had the 'memory of Charlie with "NOT PENNY'S BOAT" on his hand.

Whoa! It's all coming to a head... the original timeline and this flash-sideways 'timeline' ARE bleeding into each other! Then when he started having flashes of Penny and his son... I got goose bumps and teared up a little. For me, Desmond and Penny's love seemed so strong... I knew she'd find him someday, and when she finally did in s04e13 - There's No Place Like Home (P2)... oh my, that was one of my favorite scenes. When he realized it was her... and then she realized she had finally found him. The "is this really real" moment. To the reunion kiss.

Right up there with the s04e05 - The Constant... when Desmond was on the boat and made the call to Penny.

Now check out Widmore's office in the flash-sideways...

Basically the same picture... one framed in white, the other in black. Mmmm-hmm!

So... Eloise Hawking is now Mrs. Widmore... and Daniel Faraday is now Daniel Widmore... and Penny Widmore is now Penny Milton. Eloise tells Desmond, "Someone has clearly affected the way you see things. This is a serious problem. It is, in fact, a violation." A violation?? Of what?

Something bothers me about this conversation... Something about Eloise has been constant throughout the entire show... no matter what timeline (past, present, or future?) with the exception of the beginning when she was on the island as a young woman (in 1954 when she was Ellie)... she seems to be the only person that knows or seems to have a complete knowledge of what IS going on/what IS to happen. That brings me to Daniel's journal? Does she have it and has had it since she shot him in 1977?

She knew the path leading Desmond to the island, she knew that Daniel was meant to be or needed to be a scientist instead of a musician, that all the women in his life would be terribly hurt, she sent him to the island knowing that she will eventually shoot and kill him, she gave him that journal at his graduation with the message inside, "No matter what, remember, I will always love you. Mother". In s05e14 - The Variable, when Eloise met Penny in the hospital after Desmond was shot, Eloise told her, "For the first time, in a long time, I don't know what's going to happen next."

In the original timeline, Eloise is helping to get the Oceanic 6, plus Ben, plus, Desmond, plus John Locke's body back to the island. In this flash-sideways she's trying to stop Desmond from seeking out the what?... the truth?... reality?... it's as if she wants this timeline to become the reality. Then again, in this reality, her son is alive and healthy and she is married to Widmore. She seems to have a lot of wealth and power. She obviously doesn't want to give up all that she's gained.

Is it a good thing or a bad thing that Desmond went with Sayid? And in the flash-sideways, he's going to start 'waking up' everyone on his flight... "I just need to show them something." I take that as how Charlie had to show HIM something! Things are gonna get interesting!

Black conservatives ripped for supporting Tea Party movement

2010-04-08T01:41:00.000-04:00

Black conservatives ripped for supporting Tea Party movement
Associated Press - 4/7/2010 6:15:00 AM

ALBANY, NY - They've been called Oreos, traitors and Uncle Toms, and are used to having to defend their values. Now black conservatives are really taking heat for their involvement in the mostly white Tea Party movement -- and for having the audacity to oppose the policies of the nation's first black president.

"I've been told I hate myself. I've been called an Uncle Tom. I've been told I'm a spook at the door," said Timothy F. Johnson, chairman of the Frederick Douglass Foundation, a group of black conservatives who support free market principles and limited government.

"Black Republicans find themselves always having to prove who they are. Because the assumption is the Republican Party is for whites and the Democratic Party is for blacks," he said.

Johnson and other black conservatives say they were drawn to the Tea Party movement because of what they consider its commonsense fiscal values of controlled spending, less taxes and smaller government. The fact that they're black — or that most tea partyers are white — should have nothing to do with it, they say.

"You have to be honest and true to yourself. What am I supposed to do, vote Democratic just to be popular? Just to fit in?" asked Clifton Bazar, a 45-year-old New Jersey freelance photographer and conservative blogger.

Opponents have branded the Tea Party as a group of racists hiding behind economic concerns — and reports, as yet unproven, that some tea partyers were lobbing racist slurs at black congressmen during last month's heated healthcare vote give them ammunition.

But these black conservatives don't consider racism representative of the movement as a whole — or race a reason to support it.

Angela McGlowan, a black congressional candidate from Mississippi, said her Tea Party involvement is "not about a black or white issue."

"It's not even about Republican or Democrat. from my standpoint," she told The Associated Press. "All of us are taxed too much."

Still, she's in the minority. As a nascent grassroots movement with no registration or formal structure, there are no racial demographics available for the Tea Party movement; it's believed to include only a small number of blacks and Hispanics.

Some black conservatives credit President Barack Obama's election — and their distaste for his policies — with inspiring them and motivating dozens of black Republicans to plan political runs in November.

For black candidates like McGlowan, Tea Party events are a way to reach out to voters of all races with her conservative message. "I'm so proud to be a part of this movement! I want to tell you that a lot of people underestimate you guys," the former national political commentator for Fox News told the cheering crowd at a Tea Party rally in Nashville, Tenn., in February.

Tea Party voters represent a new model for these black conservatives — away from the black, liberal Democratic base located primarily in cities, and toward a black and white conservative base that extends into the suburbs.

Black voters have overwhelmingly backed Democratic candidates, support that has only grown in recent years. In 2004, presidential candidate Sen. John Kerry won 88 percent of the black vote; four years later, 95 percent of black voters cast ballots for Obama.

Black conservatives don't want to have to apologize for their divergent views. "I've gotten the statement, 'How can you not support the brother?'" said David Webb, an organizer of New York City's Tea Party 365, Inc. movement and a conservative radio personality.

Since Obama's election, Webb said some black conservatives have even resorted to hiding their political views. "I know of people who would play the (liberal) role publicly, but have their private opinions," he said. "They don't agree with the policy but they have to work, live and exist in the community ... Why can't we speak openly and honestly if we disagree?"

Racism and ObamaCare

2010-04-07T22:08:00.000-04:00

Racism and ObamaCare
Star Parker - Syndicated Columnist - 4/5/2010 9:25:00 AM

Like chewing gum stuck to the heel of your shoe, racism seems to be stuck forever to American public discourse. No matter what we do or what happens, somebody will find a racial motive.

Democrats have passed government healthcare with no Republican votes. Their leadership threatened and bribed their own members to eek out a majority. They resorted to an arcane procedure that maybe 100 people in the whole country can explain in order to pass a massive bill that polls show a majority of Americans don't want.

The federal government, for the first time ever, will force every American to buy, with a big chunk of their income, a product designed by government bureaucrats, with an army of IRS agents snooping on each of us to make sure we did it.

And how are many liberals explaining why so many Americans are ticked off?

It's because our president is black. It's about racism.

Even me. I'm steamed. And even though I happen to be black – I've even spoken at some Tea Party rallies – I still must be a racist.

Obama's approval rating has dropped from 70 percent when he was elected to 50 percent today. His disapproval has skyrocketed from 10 percent when he was elected to 42 percent today.

Per the Washington Post, in January 2009 58 percent of Americans said that the Obama presidency helped race relations. By January 2010, this was down to 40 percent.

Has this wave of disillusionment with Obama been driven by a sudden realization that the man Americans elected president is black?

House Speaker Nancy Pelosi's approval has dropped from 41 percent in January 2009 to 36 percent today and her disapproval has risen from 42 percent to 54 percent. Is she black?

Were the raucous townhalls last summer – which gave birth to the Tea Party movement – where irate constituents gave their representatives a piece of their mind about ObamaCare, racially motivated?

Care to understand what all this is really about?

Consider a powerful observation about a former time by one of America's great historians, Jacques Barzun. Barzun was a professor and dean at Columbia University and a Presidential Medal of Freedom winner.

"We make a great mistake in calling the American War of Independence, the 'American Revolution,'" he wrote. "In 1776 the Americans rebelled against recent rules and impositions. What they wanted was not a new type of government, but the old type they enjoyed. They were used to many freedoms, which they claimed as the immemorial rights of Englishmen. Once they defeated the English armies and expelled the Loyalists, they went back to their former ways, which they modestly enlarged, and codified in the Bill of Rights."

In a similar fashion today, Americans are rebelling as the freedom we have enjoyed, freedom which defines life in this country, is being taken away and new "rules and impositions" are being imposed.

It's not about theory or some abstract ideology. The intense feelings flow from losing what you have and what you know is vital.

What is new today is we can no longer continue the illusion of having our cake and eating it. We can no longer afford to be both a big government entitlement state and a free, creative, and prosperous nation. It's the prosperity created by our freedom that has financed the entitlements. But now the entitlements are overtaking and strangling our freedom.

So now is a time of choosing. We're either going to remain the land of the free or transform into the land of the bureaucrat.

The antipathy of activists toward Mr. Obama is not about how he looks but what he has done. That he has chosen and imposed on us the path of bureaucracy.

"LOST" - Another Look At Past Episodes

2010-04-07T00:27:00.000-04:00

After watching some past episodes, a few things jumped out at me that didn't really stand out so much at the time... but after last week's episode, they strike a whole new chord.

Season 3, Episode 8: Flashes Before Your Eyes

After Desmond blows the hatch and temporarily goes back in time...

Charles Widmore says to Desmond, when he asks for Penny's hand, "You will never be a great man."

Eloise Hawking was in the store showing Desmond the ring, but she wouldn't let him buy it. According to her, he wasn't supposed to, Desmond David Hume. Then she proceeded to tell him his life story leading to the island. She tells him, "Pushing that button is the only truly great thing you'll ever do."

Season 3, Episode 9: Stranger In A Strange Land

In Jack's flashback there's this Asian chick, and her gift is to see who people are and mark them. She tells Jack, "You are a leader, a great man."

Isabelle (an Other) tells him his mark (tattoos) read: He walks amongst us, but he is not one of us. Jack tells Isabelle, "That's what they say, it's not what they mean."

Easter BBQ

2010-04-06T01:43:00.000-04:00

For some reason it was decided that we would have the family Easter dinner on Saturday instead of Sunday... okay, I'm flexible. That's why I was doing the lawn on Easter Sunday.

I only took a couple of pictures... I did get some video, but the software to convert it doesn't work on my new computer. I've been saving the files to my computer until I can afford to buy something.

Mom's Visit

2010-04-05T23:53:00.000-04:00

Mom came for a visit today... I believe this is the first visit when she has come without a reason, a "just stopping by" visit... we had a nice lengthy visit.

Yesterday I spent the day mowing and weed-eating the yard. It was soooo HOT! I drank a whole pitcher of ice tea and a bottle of gatorade... without having to stop for a bathroom break... I sweated it all out. I was so tired by the end of the day, I barely had enough energy to take my clothes off and get into the shower. And, oh man... I was feeling it today! I was gimpin' around all day. It hurt to get up, it hurt to walk, and it hurt to sit down. *LOL*

Saturday night Missy was on the deck chasing bugs... which she would bring in. She brought a june bug in and then her and Simon chased it around the kitchen floor like an air hockey puck.

"LOST" - The Package

2010-04-03T02:56:00.001-04:00

Mar. 30 Episode: The Package

Behind the "magical mystery" door on the sub was Desmond... whew! Good to see #108 wasn't Charles Widmore!

So, in the Alternate Timeline, Jin and Sun are not married... but, by the end of the show we find out she is pregnant. Very interesting.

When MIB/NotLocke approached Sun at the garden and reached out his hand to her, instead of accepting it and letting MIB/NotLocke take her to Jin, Sun ran. **Lesson learned: This is why we watch where we are running!** So, Sun is either:

a candidate and that's why MIB/NotLocke couldn't hurt or take her, he needed her to come willingly.
he just didn't want to scare her because he needs her to keep Jin in his camp.

Why didn't MIB/NotLocke pick her up and take her to Jin?

She's a candidate?
He can't touch her?

I'm wondering, and I'll have to go back to previous episodes to investigate, has MIB/NotLocke touched any of the candidates? He held his hand out to Kate... we didn't get to see if she took it. IS that why he told Claire that Kate is not a candidate, that her name had been crossed out? Because Kate did take his hand, thus joining his team? Like when vampires can't come in unless invited... if you take MIB/NotLocke's outstretched hand, you're considered recruited.

And what was Sun looking at in the mirror of her hotel room? It was just odd. Like she was noticing something different.

Jin seems very important to MIB/NotLocke. Is it because he is a candidate or he just needs Jin to get Sun? He says he doesn't know which one is the candidate, but I think he's lying.

I believe they are both candidates. When Jacob went to see them at their wedding, it looked like he may have touched them both... although you don't actually see his hand touching Sun, but her hair bounces as if something moved her arm. But he made mention of their love, "It is a very special thing. Never take it for granted.". I feel almost certain they are both candidates... together. One hinges on the other. Maybe the Beatles were right... All We really do Need Is Love!

When Jack reached out his hand to Sun... I felt right then... Jack must be the one! Sun accepted his hand, thus considered recruited into Jacob's camp.

I really hate seeing Locke as the bad guy... I know it's not technically Locke, but still!

I do feel better about Ben's change/redemption... he told on MIB *snicker* to Ilana and Jack, about where to find him... on Hydra Island.

The Real Reason for Easter - Revelation Song

2010-04-02T01:13:00.003-04:00